#ben solo oneshot

[nostarfights]

With You In My Head

Pairing: Kylo Ren X fem!Reader

Summary: You and Kylo finally re-unite when he comes back from a mission after what feels like years apart.

Warnings: Mentions of Kylo getting hurt, having cuts and bruises + kissing, cuddling

Word Count: 1.4k

a/n: i hope y'all like this!

the gif below does not belong to me

At this point, Kylo had been away on a mission for a little over a month and tonight he was finally returning to the ship. To say you were excited to see him again would be understatement. You were simply bursting at the seams with happiness and the thrill of the fact that you would get to see your lover again tonight.

After all, the two of you had never spent this much time apart since you had started dating nearly seven months ago and you were yearning to be able to touch and kiss him again.

The mere idea of being able to sleep next to him and cuddle with him again tonight was just so exciting. You had been looking forward to this ever since the day he left for this particular mission.

Kylo had told you the day before that he would be arriving in one of the ship's hangars at 6pm the following night. And while you sat on the bed in you and Kylo’s shared quarters waiting for a droid to alert you that his ship was going to land soon, the current time was 530pm.

You had tried sleeping in that morning as a way of passing the time but it was no use and your body naturally awoke at 8am. Due to your excitement and impatience, today had felt incredibly long and boring. Your day was filled with rewatching his most recent message to you a few times while you worked, which made you quite a bit worried because you could see a few cuts and bruises on his handsome face.

So, you tried to just focus on and think about work for the rest of the work day. Which didn’t work either, you were just excited about seeing him again and time seemed to go by so slowly today.

But as you waited in your shared quarters for that particular alert, you easily let thoughts of Kylo fill your mind whilst you laid down on your bed and spaced out a bit.

You thought of how the two of you would always dance together in the living room of your quarters after an exhausting day of work, music playing quietly while Kylo would sway you two together as if you were one. You thought about how you always patch each other up whenever you got hurt as well as the gentleness and love in these moments while you softly touched each other.

You thought about his scent and touch and how they both relaxed you so easily. It didn’t matter how stressful your day could have been, the second Kylo got back to your quarters, wrapped his arms around you and his scent filled your nose, your stress instantly went away. You thought about how while everyone on the ship feared him, he had a soft spot for you, he always had. With Kylo as your partner, you never wanted for anything because he gave you everything you could have ever wanted in a friend and in a lover. You thought about how whenever Kylo was feeling angry, your own touch and scent could easily calm him down and make him feel okay again.

You had always been someone Kylo could completely trust and that would never change.

Luckily for you, after you had been laying there for a little while thinking about Kylo, a droid entered your bedroom to tell you that Kylo’s ship was going to land in 6 minutes. Which made you perk up instantly while your heartbeat sped up, your excitement being reignited. You then got up right away and began to run over to the hangar Kylo would be landing his ship in.

A bright smile rolled out across your lips the second Kylo turned off his ship after he landed and then started to exit it. He was so excited to see you as well, he was so lonely without your warm presence there to keep him company. Once both of his feet were safely back on the ground, you started to run up to Kylo and into his open, welcoming arms. And when he caught you just seconds later, he picked you up and twirled you around, bright smiles on both of your faces.

It felt so good to be able to hug and just feel each other again after not being able to for so many days. After Kylo had set you back down, you began to hold his face in your hands and press a passionate kiss to his lips, a single moment barely passing you by. He kissed you back immediately, his hands holding your own face.

This kiss truly showed the other how much yearning you've been doing for one another while Kylo was gone.

After you both had pulled away, your hands remained on Kylo’s face while you simply stared into his eyes with a loving gaze and you gently stroked his cheeks with both of your thumbs. You were still feeling a bit concerned about him after seeing the cuts and bruises on his face that he had acquired during this mission up close. But you assured yourself that he would be okay and all that mattered now was that he was safe and back in your arms.

Kylo met your eyes with a loving look in his eyes of his own, his eyebrows now furrowing, “I missed you so much, angel.” he told you, his brown eyes tearing up while he quickly pulled you into another hug the second he finished speaking. “I missed you too, Ky. I’m so glad that you’re back in one piece.” you replied while you hugged him back. And as he tightly hugged you, happy tears began to slowly fall down your cheeks and you squeezed him even tighter in return.

The sound of a sniffle coming from you caused Kylo to pull away instantly, his large hands now on your shoulders as he looked into your eyes with pure concern. He frowned at the sight of your tears, “What’s wrong, my love?” he quietly asked while he gently wiped your tears away.

You shook your head, confirming that you weren’t upset, “Nothing, pretty boy. I’m just really happy to see you, I had been so worried after seeing the cuts and bruises on your face in your last message. I’m glad that you're okay, my love.” you answered, the sound of you calling him those sweet pet names making him blush.

He nodded in understanding and began to hold your face again, “I’m okay, princess. I promise that you never have to worry about me, though I know you will anyway.” he assured you as he stroked your cheeks, the last sentence of his assurance making you laugh a little.

This easily made Kylo happy to know that he was able to comfort you and make your tears go away. “I love you so much, baby. Let’s go back to our quarters, I wanna hold my girl.” he said a moment later, earning another smile and nod of your head from you.

He then quickly went back to his ship, grabbed his bag and slung it over his shoulder, taking your hand in his once he got back to where you were standing. Letting you lead the way back to your quarters with another smile of his own on his pretty face, his cheeks still blushing a little.

As soon as you two reached your quarters, within a blink of an eye Kylo set his things down and scooped you up into his arms, making you laugh while he quickly walked over to your bedroom. Upon setting you down on your side of the bed, Kylo quickly took off the robes covering the upper half of his body and raced over to his side.

Once you were both settled in bed, Kylo opened his arms for you once more and you crawled into them. They felt so warm and comforting while you got comfortable on his broad chest, both your head and one of your hands resting there.

A content expression took over your faces as you laid there together, “I love you so much, angel, more than you’ll ever know.” Kylo whispered, leaning his head against yours while a smile broke out across his face. “I love you too, Ky, so so much.” you replied, now able to feel relaxed for once now that Kylo had safely come back to you.

NAVIGATION

[kaminokatie]

Feelings || Kylo Ren

Synopsis - After first meeting you, Kylo Ren can't get you out of his mind. After the First Order Ball, Kylo takes you back to your quarters.

Warnings -NSFW.

Word Count - 3.1k.

[Caffeinate Me]

You were General Hux’s personal assistant, you had been for the last four months now. He had decided that he needed some help with paperwork and had elected you for the role. Your duties stemmed far from paperwork though; you helped plan battles and all sorts. You were currently bent over Hux’s office table, pointing at a map of the galaxy when the door had opened behind you. You stood up and straightened your back, looking at the intruder. 

“Am I interrupting something?” Came the modulated voice of Kylo Ren from underneath his mask. 

You gulped and shook your head. “Not at all, Mr Ren.” Despite knowing who he was, this was your first time meeting the infamous force user. 

Kylo’s head snapped in Hux’s direction as he cleared his throat. “The Supreme Leader wishes to see you, General Hux.” 

“He does?” Hux asked. A speck of fear shone in his eyes, but he gulped and nodded. “Of course.” He said his goodbyes quickly before exiting the room, leaving you alone with Kylo Ren. 

There was an awkward silence between the two of you as you rolled up the map of the galaxy and placed it underneath your arm. You were about to excuse yourself when Kylo spoke. “What’s your name?” 

You looked startled for a second, looking around the room to make sure he was definitely talking to you. “My name is Y/N L/N,” you replied, trying to sound confident in yourself. 

“I haven’t seen you around before,” he mused, walking further into the room. “What is it you do?” 

“I’m General Hux’s personal assistant,” you responded. “I help do paperwork and also go as far as planning some of the battles.” 

Kylo hummed. “That will be why I haven’t seen you around at all then. Hux must be keeping you all to himself.” You couldn’t help but blush at his statement pondering, for what reason you weren’t sure. There was more silence as you continued to clear up your things from the desk. “How long have you been working with the General?” He asked, walking up to you slowly. His lightsaber was swinging by his side with every step he took and you couldn’t help but feel slightly intimidated by his large presence. 

“A few months,” you looked over your shoulder at his cracked mask. “Is there anything I can do for you, Mr Ren?” You asked suddenly once your things were cleared away. 

He shook his head. “No. I don’t believe there is.” 

You nodded in response. “Well if that’s the case I shall head out and get to doing some paperwork.” 

“Of course,” Kylo replied. He watched as you walked out of the room carrying your things by your side. He knew that his mind would be plagued by you for weeks to come. 

Since that day Kylo had been seeing you everywhere. If Hux was around then so were you, by his side. Tonight was the night of the ‘First Order Ball’. This was a simple yet elegant ball put together by General Hux and yourself for all the members of the First Order to celebrate the most recent successes across the galaxy. Kylo had begrudgingly agreed to attend - to show his mask for a while before leaving. Although this was a formal event, Kylo wore his usual attire; a mask to cover his face and completely covered from head to toe in all black. As soon as he stepped into the ship’s main room, his eyes landed on your form. You were tucked away in the corner, of course with General Hux by your side, chatting with colleagues and sipping on your alcoholic beverage. Your elegant black dress, paired with black flats, flattered your frame perfectly and Kylo felt his mouth run dry at the sight. Kylo felt his eyebrow raise underneath his mask as General Hux’s arm wrapped around your waist. Were you two a couple or something? He didn’t even know why he cared so much, but he did. 

Kylo felt a lump form in his throat as he found himself walking over to you, his feet seemingly moving on their own. His presence was noticed by most as he approached you and your group of colleagues and as soon as Hux realised he was there, he retracted his arm from around your waist and stood to attention. 

“Good evening Mr Ren,” you said, a polite smile gracing your lips.

Kylo felt his heart skip a beat as you addressed him. “It’s nice to see you. Y/N, was it?” He asked. Of course he remembered your name, he just wanted to act ‘cool’. 

“That’s right,” you grinned with a nod. “It’s nice to see you too, Sir.” 

“Ren,” Hux said sternly, his eyes boring into the masked man’s frame. “I didn’t expect you to show up.”

Kylo looked at you and smiled underneath the mask before responding, “wouldn’t miss it for the world.” You blushed at his words and looked down at your feet before sipping at your drink once more. The night continued with laughter, dancing and of course, drinking. You could feel the alcohol coursing through your veins as the night went on, your vision becoming more and more blurry with each drink you downed. Kylo stood by your side, watching you without saying a word. He was just enjoying being in your presence. As the night came winding down, more and more people were leaving the ball to go to bed. Eventually it was just you, Hux and Kylo standing in the large empty room. 

“I’d say that was a success,” you slurred, placing down your last glass of wine on a table. 

“A success indeed,” Hux replied. “Are you feeling okay Y/N? You’ve had quite a lot to drink.”

You threw your hands in the air and grinned. “I feel fantastic.” 

Kylo couldn’t help but smile underneath his mask at your drunken silliness but Hux was unbothered. “You should really go to bed,” Hux said sternly. “We still have a job to do tomorrow. Come, I’ll take you to your room.” 

Kylo placed a menacing hand on Hux’s shoulder to stop him from grabbing your arm. “I’ll take her,” his modulated voice came. “I’m heading back to my quarters anyway.” 

Hux pursed his lips but nodded. “Fine.” 

“Come Y/N,” Kylo said, holding out a gloved hand to you. You continued to grin and clumsily took his hand, skipping out of the room. Hux watched with disdain as you dragged Kylo out of the room, leading him to your quarters. 

“Did you have fun tonight?” You eventually asked Kylo as you made your way down the halls. 

“It was… tolerable,” Kylo replied, his eyes glued to your form as you continued to skip down the halls. Your hand was still firmly grasped in his. “I enjoyed it more than I thought I would if I’m being honest.” 

You smiled widely. “I’m glad.” The rest of the walk, or in your case skipping, was done in silence. Your heart was beating wildly in your chest as you reached your quarters. You squeezed Kylo’s hand before letting go and pressing your back against your bedroom door.  “This is me.” Kylo hesitated for a moment, but you just smiled at him and whispered in a seductive voice, “would you like to come in?” 

Kylo was slightly taken back by your sudden forwardness and his eyes widened. Despite this, he still felt himself nod his head in agreement. You opened the door to your room and stumbled in, Kylo following closely behind. Once you were both in your quarters, you closed the door with your foot and stumbled further into the room. Kylo’s eyes followed your form as you began to unzip your dress. His mouth ran dry as he watched your bare back come into his view as your dress slipped down onto the floor. You looked over your shoulder at him and smirked, stepping out of your dress that was now pooled at your ankles. “What are you doing?” Kylo asked, trying his hardest not to stutter. 

“Getting undressed,” you slurred. You kept your back to Kylo as you picked your dress up off the floor and threw it in the washing basket in the corner of your room. His eyes stared at the plump of your ass through your lace underwear as you bent over and he felt his cock harden at the sight. Kylo was so far in a trance he hadn’t noticed you had turned around and were staring at him with folded arms covering your bare breasts. “See something you like?” You asked cockily, swaying from side to side. 

Kylo’s hands gripped into fists by his side as he fought off the thoughts in his mind. You were drunk, so drunk, and he was sober. He couldn’t do this, but by all the God’s in the world did he want to. Ever since he first met you, Kylo had been unable to get you out of his mind and now you were standing in front of him, almost completely naked, clearly putting the moves on him. “You’re drunk,” he finally spoke up. 

“So?” You asked, tilting your head to the side. Your arms dropped to your sides revealing your perfect tits and Kylo felt his resolve break. He was nothing but a weak man in a mask. “I’m not a force user, but I sense that you want me,” you whispered seductively as you walked up to him. You placed your hands on his shoulders and stood on your tiptoes to whisper where his ear would be had he not had the mask on. “I want you too.” 

Almost immediately, Kylo pushed you onto the large bed behind you. You fell backwards with an ‘oof’ leaving your lips as you stared up at him with wide eyes. “You have no idea how much I want you,” he growled, climbing on top of you. You could feel his hardened cock beneath his trousers push against your leg and you let out a soft whine at the feeling. Kylo let his hands roam around your body, stopping at your breasts as he began to knead them desperately. “Since I first met you all those weeks ago, I’ve been unable to get you out of my fucking mind.” You said nothing but whimpers as his gloved hands played with your nipples, forcing them to pucker up. “Your body is so beautiful.” He was enjoying playing with your tits as if they were toys, but his painfully hard cock was begging for some sort of relief. Kylo grinded himself against your thighs, soft gasps leaving his lips and coming through the modulator like music to your ears. You felt yourself beginning to sober up, desperate for more. 

“Touch me,” you whimpered. 

“I am,” Kylo replied, his hands still playing with your breasts and nipples. 

“Not there.”

“Then where?” 

“Here,” you whispered, grabbing his hands and leading them down to your clothed cunt. Kylo sucked in a breath as he touched the lace of your underwear, fingers dancing under the waistband. You stared into the eyeholes of his mask, knowing he was staring back at you as he slipped a finger inside of you. You couldn’t help but let out a soft little moan and bite your lip as he began his movements inside of you. With a few more thrusts he inserted a second finger into you, stretching you open deliciously. “Mr Ren,” you whimpered out. 

“Call me Kylo,” he replied, biting his own lip as he stared at you. The faces you were making were pushing him over the edge. Kylo needed to be inside of you. He withdrew his fingers from you and fumbled with the belt of his cloak before letting it drop to the floor. You could see the outline of his muscles through his tight clothing and you truly realised how big he actually was. As you stared at him, mouth hung open, Kylo took off the rest of his clothes until he was completely naked: cock standing to attention. He was leaking pre-cum already. 

He went to take off his mask but you stopped him in his tracks, “don’t,” you whispered. “I don’t want to see who I’m fucking just yet…” 

Kylo tilted his head to the side in confusion but nodded. “As you wish.” 

He climbed on top of you, lining himself up with your entrance. Without warning, Kylo slowly pushed inside of you inch by inch, your eyes widening as he bottomed out inside of you. He went to move but you shook your head, “give me a second,” you whimpered. Kylo nodded and kept himself still for a little while longer, allowing you to adjust to his large length. After a few moments, you finally nodded. “O-Okay, you can move.” Kylo retracted his cock from your sopping cunt before ploughing himself back in, his movements starting off rough already. He couldn’t get enough of your warm wetness enveloping him, his cock already threatening to explode as you clenched around him. Your sweet moans filled the room, head spinning from the alcohol in your body and the pleasure that was filling your senses. It was all too much. 

Kylo’s hips thrusted against yours, soft moans leaving his lips with each movement he made. His hands were located on either side of your head, bunching at the sheets below. “You’re so tight,” Kylo groaned, his movements slowing down slightly. You blushed at his words, arms wrapping around his neck and pulling his torso closer to yours. Your breasts pushed against his bare chest, bouncing with each painfully hard thrust. “Gods I’ve wanted this from the second I saw you.” 

You couldn’t talk. You were being fucked dumb. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head, moaning shamelessly as his words hit your ears. “More,” you whimpered out. Kylo happily obliged, his thrusts speeding up once more. He pulled out of you completely before slamming back into you a few times, forcing you to let out a little scream of pleasure. “I’m going to cum!” You cried out, your orgasm bubbling in your gut. Within seconds, you were coming undone on his cock. Gushing over his length as he continued to rock into you. 

“Oh fuck,” Kylo gasped, his own release prematurely spilling out of the tip of his cock as your walls fluttered around him. His hips stuttered as he continued to cum deep inside of you, muffled groans coming through his voice modulator. As his hips slowed down to a halt, your breathing became more shallow as you came down from your own high. “I’m sorry.. I-I couldn’t help it,” he whispered. His intimidating demeanour changing to one of a vulnerable man.

“Hey,” you grinned. “It’s okay. It was amazing.” He pulled out of you with a pop and rolled over, laying on his back and seemingly staring at the ceiling. He didn’t respond to you, after all, he was slightly embarrassed. “Can I… See your face now?” You asked shyly. 

Kylo sat up, staring in your direction. “Are you sure?” He asked. His heart was beating rapidly both out of nerves and from the activity you had just done. You just nodded. Kylo sighed and lifted his hands up to remove his mask. His face came into your view: he was extremely handsome, more handsome than you ever imagined. Too handsome to be hiding his face under such a mask. His black hair was wavy and was slicked to his face with sweat and his brown eyes avoided your gaze. 

“Hey, look at me,” you whispered, using your finger to direct his face to yours. “What’s wrong?” You asked. 

“I don’t know,” was all he replied. 

“Don’t worry about anything,” you cooed. 

He gazed into your eyes and silence fell upon you once more. All that could be heard was both of your breathing echoing off the walls of the room. Eventually, Kylo spoke again. “I probably should have asked you this before but… you and Hux… Are you two together?” 

Your eyes widened in surprise and you couldn’t help but laugh slightly. You shook your head, “no. No we’re not.” 

“You’re very close,” Kylo mumbled. His voice was deep without the modulator, you thought it was music to your ears before, but now it was a symphony. 

“I’m his personal assistant, I have to be,” you chuckled.

“Be my personal assistant,” Kylo said quickly and without thinking. He didn’t even need a personal assistant, he just couldn’t bear the thought of you being around Hux more than him. 

“I don’t know about that,” you grinned. “I don’t think I’d be able to concentrate very much with you around.” Kylo sighed but nodded his head in understanding. He wanted to attempt to persuade you, but he knew that you wouldn’t budge on the situation. You were comfortable where you were. 

You stared at his lips as he thought deeply. You wanted nothing more than to kiss him right now. To seal your night with a passionate kiss, but you didn’t want to intrude. “Do you maybe want to do that again?” Kylo asked, his eyes searching yours for an answer. 

You smiled widely and nodded. “I’d very much like to do this again.” 

Kylo smiled weakly at you and moved to dangle his long legs off the edge of the bed. “I should probably get back to my quarters.” 

“No!” You said quickly, holding your hand out to his shoulder in an attempt to stop him from moving. “Stay with me tonight. I won’t tell anybody, I promise.” 

“You really want me to stay here tonight?” He asked. You just nodded. “I guess I can stay,” he said, suddenly smiling at you. 

“Come to sleep with me,” you said, tugging on his arm and pulling him under the covers next to your naked body. Kylo settled in beside you, wrapping his arm around your form. He placed a kiss on your temple as you closed your eyes. You were content in this moment and never wanted it to end. 

“I like you alot Y/N,” Kylo muttered as you began to drift off to sleep. 

“I like you too Kylo,” you mumbled, half asleep. Within seconds, you were snoring lightly which made Kylo chuckle slightly, being careful not to wake you. He hoped that you wouldn't regret this when you woke up next to him in the morning, that you meant what you said when you told him you wanted to do this again, but only time would tell. For now, Kylo closed his eyes and allowed himself to fall into a deep sleep, possibly the best sleep he had had in a long time. Consequences be damned, he liked you and you liked him. Maybe this was the start of something beautiful. 

[cowboygenesis]

3: al limone | kylo ren x reader

part 3 of the "bump it, cool it" series: masterlist.

pairing: [modern!au] kylo ren x reader

chapter warnings: explicit language, arguing, smoking, drugs.

word count: 4k

series summary: when your roommate’s older brother needs a place to crash, you begrudgingly offer up your couch— only to realize he’s the most insufferable, entitled asshole you’ve ever met. the worst part? you can’t seem to stop thinking about him.

notes: last chapter of the bulk i've written this past week. i'm slowly running out of adam driver gifs, so please send more if you have access lolol

You wake up in a daze, eyes glazed with sleep when you rub them. Your bed is a mess of blankets and pillows piled against the wall, partially covering your legs. You hear your PC fluttering in your ears and the subtle smell of soy wax hovering in the air. After changing into your home-appropriate clothes— a pair of loose sweatpants and a tank top— and washing off your makeup, you must have abandoned your desk and fallen asleep.

Rumbling sleepily, you get up and yawn. The small digital clock on your desk reads ‘00:34’, and your stomach rumbles. You haven’t eaten since the afternoon, and your body is beginning to catch up with that fact.

You throw on a semi-fresh hoodie from your pile of clothes and leave your room. As you close the door behind you, you realize that the apartment feels warmer. A soft light spreads through the hall, and a quiet tune plays from the TV in the living room— you think it’s Sade.

Rey is home.

You hear her laughter before you even round the corner. When you stroll into the kitchen, you find the siblings sitting at the table, two bowls and a bottle of red sitting between them.

Right— Kylo.

Your restful nap was almost enough to make you believe his arrival was merely a bad dream. Alas, there he was, sitting at the dining table with a somewhat bright smile on his face as he listens to his sister speak. Stupidly, the sight of it is enough to make you reconsider your outlook.

Rey’s eyes brighten when she spots you, calling out your name with a pleasant lilt. She sports an outfit similar to you, leaning against the backrest with her legs tucked.

“There you are!” she calls out, motioning for you to come closer. You give her a lazy smile, still trying to blink away the sleep as you approach. “Did you two get to meet?”

Kylo, leaning back in his chair with a nuanced smile on his face, meets your gaze over the rim of his wine glass. “Oh, we met.”

“Right,” You give him a deadpan look before turning your attention to Rey again. You’re already starting to feel that simmering annoyance in your gut as you approach her from behind and wrap your arms around her shoulders. “I had no idea he was coming.”

Rey leans against your chest and sighs— you think it might be apologetic. “I know, I’m sorry for not texting.”

“It was impromptu,” Kylo adds flatly, and you decide to ignore him due to his uninterested tone alone.

“You gave him the keys,” you hum, arching a brow that Rey can’t catch.

“Well, yeah,” she shrugs. “I wasn’t sure when you’d get home, and work got hectic around the time he left.”

Kylo’s eyes meet yours, and your nostrils flare at the smirk painting his lips— long gone is the warm, bright grin you caught when you first walked in. He’s enjoying this, in a sick, sadistic way.

Rey, oblivious to the silent battle waging between you and her brother, claps her hands together. You sigh, breaking your embrace and moving to stand at her side.

“Now that you’re both here, you can finally get to know each other properly,” She beams at you. “Come sit.”

You purse your lips, pointedly avoiding Kylo’s gaze as it seems to bore into you relentlessly. You’re still unsure about the nature of his antics, but with Rey to intervene, you feel a little more at ease. “Fine.”

You pull up the chair between them and take a hesitant seat. Rey gives you an encouraging smile before her eyebrows shoot up. “Oh! Let me get you a glass.”

“It’s fine—” You begin your protest, but the chair is already scraping against the floor as your roommate shoots up.

Your eyes flicker toward Kylo, and you find that he’s still staring. His dark gaze scans your sleep-swollen face, half-clean hoodie, and whatever else he seems to be finding funny about your visage because for a moment, you catch him chuckle.

“There you go,” Rey sighs after closing the cupboard behind you. She approaches you with a fresh wine glass, setting it in front of you and reaching for a half-finished bottle of red.

Kylo’s gaze moves away almost immediately, but it’s not out of shame— it’s like he’s pointedly adamant about not giving you any more attention than he needs to.

“So,” Rey starts, pouring you a hefty glass before she sits down again. “How bad was it?”

You blink, placing your fingers around the stem of your glass. “What?”

“Your first impression of Kylo.” She grins, playful and a little teasing when her gaze flickers to him.

You glance at him, too. He’s still leaning back, one hand curled around his glass. He quirks a brow as if daring you to say something unhinged. You’d love to, but you know better than to entertain his sick fantasies.

Your fingers tighten around your stemware. “I thought he was an intruder.”

Rey snorts, giving her brother a knowing glare. You have a feeling she doesn’t know you’re being literal. “That bad?”

Kylo hums, setting his glass down. “She tried to kill me,” He tilts his head slightly, eyes flickering over you in a way that makes your skin prickle. “So feisty.”

You shoot him a look, but not wanting to disappoint Rey, you keep your tone light. “Go to hell.”

His smile widens just a fraction, and your blood boils. ‘What would it take to wipe that shit off his freckled fucking face?’ you think.

As expected, Rey doesn’t seem to notice your quarrel. Growing up with Kylo, you assume she’s used to the banter or deliberately doesn’t want to be part of it.

“I knew you’d get along,” she smiles, reaching for her dish and moving it your way. It’s a half-finished bowl of pasta in a cream-colored sauce, speckled with bits of parsley and chili. Even from here, you can feel the pleasant fragrance of lemon. “Eat. It’s the least he can do.”

You eye the food suspiciously, then shift your gaze to Kylo. “You cooked?”

He lets out a low snort, followed by a lazy eye roll. You realize it’s the first time you’ve heard him laugh, and somehow, the sound sends a jolt down your spine. “Do I look like I cook?”

You roll your eyes to match his expression, grabbing a fork anyway. You’re hungry, and you’d rather risk poisoning than deny a free, home-cooked meal. “Figured I should ask before I drop dead.”

“He helped me out,” Rey explains through a scoff, cupping her chin in her palms as she watches you stab some penne onto the prongs. Silently, you imagine Rey stressing over the pots while Kylo hands her ingredients or stirs the pasta water with a juvenile scowl on his face. Serves him well, you think.

“I’m not trying to kill you,” he quips flatly, and you quirk an eyebrow at him. You notice that like most things coming out of his mouth, his words sound like a taunt. “Yet.”

“I guess we’ll find out soon enough.”

Rey watches as you take a bite, amusement flickering across her face. The dish is lukewarm by now, but bursting with subtle flavors— garlic, onion, and that lemon peel you smelled before.

“What is it?” you question between bites, feeling the warmth of the spices settling within your belly.

“Penne al limone,” your roommate explains, taking a sip of her wine. You don’t catch the usual prideful smile on her face, so you assume the dish was whipped up in a hurry. Still, like everything Rey prepares, it’s delicious.

“Mhm,” you nod, purposefully giving her an ambiguous look. “Did Kylo actually help you, or—”

“Shut up and tell me if it’s good!” she pokes your bicep, and you chuckle with her— the calories seem to do fine amping your mood up, at least for now.

You look down, chewing the pasta thoughtfully before reaching for your wine. The tartness hits your tongue, followed by a brief notion of something spicy. The pasta is slightly overcooked, but you can’t imagine that’d be Rey’s fault. “It’s good.”

Kylo leans forward slightly, resting an elbow on the table. “High praise.”

Your lips try to press into a thin line, but the corners curl upward, anyway.

Rey sighs, exasperated, but there’s a fondness in her expression as she looks between the two of you. “I can already tell this is going to be a thing.”

Kylo smirks into his wine. “And by ‘this’ you mean?”

“You know exactly what it means,” she retorts, reaching across the table to nudge his arm before turning to you. “He does this— pokes, prods, and pisses you off until you show him weakness.”

You scoff, setting your fork down inside the bowl. “Pissing people off at your big age?”

Kylo lifts his glass in a mock toast, clearly unoffended by your remark. “Took you long enough to figure it out.”

You roll your eyes, willing yourself to ignore him. But he makes it difficult— you feel his subtle gaze on you through every bite or sip, like he’s waiting for a moment to pounce with those clever quips when you least expected. If he’s like this as an adult, you can’t imagine him as a teenager.

“Okay, now that you’re fed, let’s do this properly,” She gestures between the two of you. “Kylo, meet my roommate,” she enunciates your name, “she puts up with my nonsense and keeps this place from falling apart.”

Kylo tips his chin in acknowledgment, but his eyes don’t leave yours.

“She’s exaggerating,” you huff a dry laugh between bites. “She’s the one keeping things in working order. I’m a mess and a half.”

Rey rolls her eyes with a tight smile, poking your arm again. “A mess that does all our paperwork.”

You grin at her, but before you can retort, Kylo’s voice cuts through the thrum of an R&B tune. “What else?”

You blink at him, your smile dropping as you try to figure out his vague query. “What?”

“What do you do?” his gaze sharpens, placing the finished glass of wine on the table next to his bowl. “Other than tax fraud and keeping Rey in line, that is.”

You hesitate, caught off guard by the intimacy of the question. He must mean your occupation, right?

“I’m in a Master’s program for Literature,” you answer after a moment, sipping your wine. “Plus waitering at a restaurant. Part-time.”

Kylo hums, leaning lazily against his palm. You realize you had preferred when he was leaning back— the new position puts you close enough to smell his cologne. Could it be pine? “Sounds miserable.”

You let out a dry laugh, lifting your fork to pick off some more pasta from the bowl. You’re not hungry anymore, but the activity does well in distracting you from his looming presence. “Thanks.”

“I mean it.”

You raise an eyebrow, crossing your arms over your chest and leaning back. “What about you?”

Rey groans, dropping her head into her hands at your query. “Oh, no.”

Kylo’s lips twitch as he mulls your words over. “I run an IT firm.”

You tilt your head, eyeing his smug expression. You remember Rey mentioning his background in programming, but never anything about an actual firm. “An IT firm?”

He nods, shrugging softly. Come to think of it, his smirk doesn’t seem so much smug as it is… prideful. “Implementing software, testing, contracts—”

“So, capitalism, but with extra steps,” you cut him off, your own self-satisfied smirk threatening to plaster your face.

Rey cackles between sips, nearly choking on her wine as she leans in to place a hand on your bicep. “Oh, I love you.”

Kylo, to his credit, doesn’t bristle one bit. If anything, his trademark glare returns to his face. “Something like that.”

You narrow your eyes slightly, studying him. There’s something in his expression you’re struggling to read, but with adrenaline pumping through your blood, the next words come out smoothly. “Sounds miserable.”

Rey loses it. She’s full-on laughing now, clutching her stomach, while Kylo watches you with a slow, deliberate tilt of his head—like he’s deciding whether to be annoyed or entertained.

Eventually, he settles on the latter. Or maybe both, you’re not quite sure. “Touché.”

You raise your empty wine glass to finally meet his mock toast, the smirk on your lips outgrowing his own. Perhaps you could get used to playing this game, provided you’d be the one coming out victorious at the end of each day. It’s just for a few weeks, anyway, so what have you got to lose?

You reach for the wine bottle, refilling your empty glass. “So you’re pretty seriously settled. Work and all.”

Kylo gives you a look before nodding subtly. “Sure.”

You hum in acknowledgment, picking the glass up by its stem and raising it to your lips. “What happened, then?”

The subtle mirth you caught in his eyes disappears almost immediately. He lowers his glass slightly, eyeing you with his lips pressed tight. “What?”

“As in,” you begin, your tone slowing a tad once you pick up on his dry tone. Beside you, Rey’s shoulders tense. “What made you want to stay here?”

His jaw clenches, teeth gritting when he finally places his glass down. It hits the table with a loud thud, making you wince a bit. His eyes seem to darken in the dim light of the kitchen, scanning you with something akin to frustration, or worse. “No.”

You raise an eyebrow at his flat response, placing your own drink down. Your gaze briefly shifts to Rey, who looks between you with her lip caught in her teeth. You can’t quite tell what she’s thinking, but it’s obvious that you’ve overstepped a boundary.

When you look back to Kylo, you spot his fists clenched in front of him, knuckles white. You tilt your head slightly, putting on a small smile. Maybe it’s the wine, but momentarily, you feel like the two of you got along decently for a moment— like there was hope. You don’t want to fuck it up by asking the wrong questions or being insensitive. “Are you okay?”

“Stop,” he grits, raising both hands to rub at his face. “Don’t do that.”

Your eyebrows pinch further, lips close to a confused sneer when you try to meet his gaze. Your voice is soft when it comes, your last-ditch effort at maintaining some semblance of peace. “Do what?”

“That,” he near-hisses, finally meeting your gaze. His eyes are dark like a brewing storm, penetrating your skull as you swallow thickly. “Acting like you give a shit.”

“Excuse me?” you utter, incredulous at his sudden outburst.

“Guys—” Rey begins pleadingly, but she’s promptly cut off by Kylo’s hand slamming the table. It’s not violent, but the sound is enough to stun his sister into silence.

“You heard me,” he replies, his gaze locked with yours while you try your best to break away from it.

“God, sorry for trying to get to know you better,” you roll your eyes, voice mocking as the adrenaline within you begins to brew anew. You don’t understand what you’ve done wrong, yet the warm atmosphere around you seems to crumble within seconds when he speaks again.

“Right,” he scoffs, words dripping with venom, “Like I fucking asked you to.”

Oh.

His words settle into your chest like a heavy weight, making your fingers rap around the table as you prepare to bolt. Despite your developing hatred, it stings. “It’s not your fucking choice to make!”

“It’s not,” he mutters, head tilted as his gaze bores into you. It’s sharp, testing, and focused— like assessing prey. “But it’s not yours, either.”

“So what?” you rub your temples, meeting his eyes with your own. “Shall I keep to myself from now on? Keep to myself?”

“Wouldn’t be unusual,” he spits through a chuckle, words laced with venom.

You drop your gaze for a moment, gripping at the material of your sweatpants and trying to keep the tears in. You hate that he does this. You hate that he refuses to act cordial, and then pretends to know everything there is to you— it’s enough to make you stutter and babble nonsense.

“You’re right,” you laugh sardonically, eyes glazed over. “Guess I’m just a heartless bitch.”

His fury seems to drop just minimally at your words. He exhales sharply, moving his gaze away with a twitch of the lips, fingers tapping anxiously against the table. “Your own words.”

And that’s your final straw. With your heartbeat thrumming in your ears and face heating red, you push yourself away from the table with a sharp exhale. You catch Rey reaching her hand toward you in your peripheral, but all you can focus on are those fucking pools of black staring into you. There’s no mockery, no mirth, just a menial stillness that sparks embers within you.

“Fuck you,” you grit through your teeth, nails digging into your palms as you stand up. Your legs feel like cotton, but you can’t let him win by succumbing to the anger. Not while he’s watching so insistently.

“Real mature,” he huffs, voice low as he crosses his arms.

You let out a sharp breath, your fingers curling into your palms. “Mature?” You laugh, but it’s humorless as your patience thins. “You’re trying to lecture me about maturity?”

“I’m just making sure you understand,” Kylo tilts his head, eyebrows furrowed. “I don’t owe you a conversation.”

Your jaw tightens. “Uh-huh. Heaven forbid someone tries to dig,” You shake your head, exhaling sharply. “But I guess it’s not something you’re prepared to handle, right?”

His eyes flash with rage, lips pressing into a thin line. “You think you’ve got me all figured out?” he scoffs, his voice treading toward a yell. “You don’t know a damn thing.”

“Enough,” Rey interrupts, voice taut with frustration as she tries to reach for Kylo’s hand across the table. He moves away, pushing his chair back with yours. “This is ridiculous!”

You ignore her. “And whose fault is that?” You gesture vaguely at him, exasperation leaking into your tone as Kylo finally stands. His height is intimidating enough to make you halt momentarily, eyeing his stature. “You push, and push, and then dare act surprised when people stop trying.”

He exhales sharply, gripping the back of the chair like he’s considering throwing it. Instead, he shoves it back under the table with unnecessary force, making it rattle. “Good,” he mutters, turning toward the door. “Then stop fucking trying.”

You watch as he grabs his coat from the couch headrest, shrugging it on with stiff, jerky movements. His jaw is tight, his shoulders tense, but he doesn’t say another word. Just yanks the door open and disappears into the dark hallway, letting it slam shut behind him.

The silence that follows is thick. The soft jazz tune echoes through the room, interrupted by distant dog barks and cars passing through the open window. You feel Rey’s eyes on you, waiting for you to say something, but you don’t. You just swallow hard, exhaling through your nose before turning on your heel.

“I’m done,” you mutter, shaking your head as you head toward your room.

“Wait—” Rey reaches for you, but you’re already gone, disappearing down the hall where you first appeared. You don’t stop until you’re in your room, the door shutting behind you with a click. You hear her strained voice calling your name, muffled by the thick walls of the apartment.

You press your back against it, squeezing your eyes shut. Your hands are shaking, adrenaline still thrumming under your skin and finally, the hot tears come. They spill down your cheeks in thick streams, urging short hiccups from your throat.

“Fuck him,” you stutter sharply, pressing your palms against your eyes and rubbing. “Fuck him and his shitty, disrespectful attitude.”

You should have trusted your instincts when they yelled at you to decline Rey’s arrangement. Every fiber of your body screamed at you to protect your well-earned peace instead of jeopardizing it for the sake of a stranger, yet here you were, at his mercy. How pathetic it felt to fight for respect at your dinner table, in your own kitchen.

You exhale sharply, pushing yourself away from the door and moving toward the windowsill. You reach for a small tin tucked behind an aloe plant. The metal is cool against your heated skin as you pry it open, fishing out a single, neatly rolled joint that you had been saving for a special occasion— this one wasn’t what you had in mind, but you knew it’d help.

You then reach into the pocket of your hoodie, withdraw a lighter, and swiftly tug the window open. The chilled, February air hits your face, making the wet stains on your face cool. Without hesitation, you light the paper tip, urging it to life in a spark of amber.

The first inhale burns deliciously down your throat, doing enough to steady your heart's erratic, tumultuous pulsating and urge your tears to pause. You exhale slowly, watching the smoke curl into the night as you lean forward, resting your elbows on the sill. The city hums beneath you, a distant siren wailing somewhere beyond the quiet residential street. For a moment, you feel at peace again. As your senses cloud, you can almost pretend today had never happened.

That is until a brief movement in the street below urges you to look.

Kylo stands on the sidewalk, half-shrouded in shadow. The orange glow of his cigarette flares as he brings it to his lips, illuminating the sharp angles of his face even at this distance separating you.

As you watch him exhale, his gaze suddenly finds yours. Your fingers tighten around the joint, but he doesn’t move— just stands there, shoulders tense beneath his jean jacket. There’s no hostility in his stare now. If you hadn’t known better, you’d think he looked tired— maybe even regretful.

He takes another drag, his lips parting slightly as he exhales, the smoke curling toward the clouded sky above. His form rises and falls with it, yet the eye contact perseveres.

Your pulse thrums against your ribs, and you hate that he can still do this to you—that even after everything— even after the venom in his words and the heat in your own, the sight of him standing there, eyes dark and heavy-lidded, still makes something stir within you. You think it’s the onset of that sweet, positively anticipated high until your stomach lunges at the sight of his expression changing. For a moment, you think he’s smirking at you.

A cool breeze snakes through the window, slipping past the heat clinging to your skin. It makes you shiver and briefly reminds you who you’re dealing with.

You inhale sharply, letting the smoke settle in your lungs before exhaling through your nose. Then, without another glance, you shut the window and put the joint out on the ashtray sitting on your desk. The cold lingers on your skin, but you ignore it, pulling the curtains shut with a sharp flick of your wrist.

Part of you hopes he freezes his ass out there. If you wish upon your lucky star, he might lose his lighter and come begging you for yours— but then you stop yourself. Why does the thought of facing him again fill you with butterflies? Momentarily, you think it’s the anxiety. It has to be. There’s nothing about Kylo you find even remotely appealing.

And yet, as you crawl into bed, staring at the ceiling washed in soft, shifting purple light, the ghost of his gaze lingers. You tell yourself that come morning, he’ll be nothing more than a bad taste on your tongue.

But as sleep pulls you under, you dream of vast pine forests.

[cult-leadersuguru]

Safe and Sound

A/N: A small Reylo piece I wrote long ago and wanted to share here.

Summary: Ben is getting nightmares every night about Rey dying in front of him. Is up for his life companion and wife to comfort him and aleviate his pain and fear.

I do not own Star Wars nor its characters.

You thought you could save her?

Foolish child, I expected better from you! And now you will see what happens to those who disobey me.

Ben Solo whimpered slightly as he thrashed in bed, this was the third night in a row that he kept having these nightmares. His Rey, his life companion, his wife, the love of all his life.

Watch her die before you as punishment!

"N-no, Rey..." He whimpered again and tried his dammest to wake up from his nightmare, he can't move, he felt his breath caught in his lungs. He can't move and won't be able to save Rey!

With a movement of his finger, Supreme Leader Snoke snapped Rey's neck with the Force in front of his apprentice.

Now turn your dispair into anger, ignite it. You just lose her!

Ben jerked away and coughed, sitting up in bed. "REY!" His breathed is caught in his throat as he whimpers and hyperventilates, Rey... she just died again, he lost the woman that he loved.

"Ben, hey, Ben!" Rey now has her hands on her husband's shoulders. "Ben, you're okay, you're okay, it's only a nightmare." Her concerned and soothing voice was what brought Ben back to reality and he looked at his wife, there was fear in his eyes, like a fear that he had not felt ever since a long time ago. His brown eyes locked into her hazel eyes, and almost automatically he drew the woman into his arms.

"Rey..." He whispered, holding Rey in almost possessive way as if he was scared that she would disappear the next second he let her go from his tight embrace. "...Don't leave me... I... I wouldn't take it, I can't live without you..." His voice cracked a little, and he felt something wet roll down his cheeks. Tears. He had started crying. "P-Please..." He sobbed softly.

"Ben..." Rey understood now. His nightmare was about her again, just like the past few days where he would wake up in the morning and look so scared and shattered. Her arms wrapped around his back and she held him closer. "I'm right here with you, I'll never leave you. My home is here with you." Her hands cupped his damp cheeks and her hazel eyes looked into his teary brown eyes.

"How... how can I be sure? I'm scared Rey..." Ben was never one to show his emotions openly, he'd learned long ago not to be driven by emotion, currently though, he was quite scared, so hurt and uncertain of what would happen next. "If I lose you... I..."

"Shh," Rey cut him off by holding him closer to him, putting his head in her chest, close to where her heart was, it was beating calmly and gently. Her beating heart was right there, she was alive. Alive and here with him, it was going to be alright, it had to. Rey had to be alright. "It's alright, everything will be alright, Ben. I'm right here, you will not lose me." She whispered into his ear, her hands both caressing his dark hair and his back as he comforted him. "Snoke is dead, you killed him, Ben. He cannot hurt us anymore." She spoke with sincerity. "You're alright, I'm right, my love." She continued with her soothing actions. Ben leaned in her touch.

"Rey, I love you so much. I love no other woman aside you, I must protect you." Even with his teary, broken voice, Ben vowed himself to protect his wife to the best of his ability. It had to be this way, he couldn't bare to lose the love of his entire life. They had come this far to be separated by destiny. Screw destiny or fate, Ben was not going to lose his beloved Rey.

Rey smiled, knowing this was the protective and loving Ben that she loved and adored. "I know you will, Ben."

Ben looked up into her hazel eyes after a while of being nested in her arms and having his face into her chest. "I promise you."

With that he leant in, letting his lips meet with Rey's. They both held each other close as they shared one passionated kiss.

Ben now knew that no matter how scary and painful his nightmares were, they were just nightmares and not a real thing. He would not lose Rey, not now and never.

Without a doubt, he would have Rey until death did them apart, even in the afterlife they would be together and nothing was changing that.

[clqoo]

go read the ben solo character wiki and try not to cry i actually dare you. this poor kid, the freaking droid, his parents, snoke, insomnia, hearing voices. are you for real.

[kowaiitenshii]

[Wish We Never Met]

Pairing: Kylo Ren x Reader 

Plot Summary: You haven’t seen Kylo Ren since he destroyed the Jedi academy you both called home in your youth, and you want nothing more than to forget about him. That doesn’t stop him from reaching out. 

Warnings: Kidnapping. Kylo is his own warning. Angst? 

Word Count: 2.3k

A/N: Hello again everyone! This oneshot is the product of a betrayal prompt from a good friend of mine! If this does well and people enjoy it, I will be open to prompts and requests and if the demand is high enough, I may even write a part 2 for this. Thank you so much for all the love on Sunkiller Lullaby again as well!! Please enjoy! 

A perfectly clear night on Ossus, a rare meteor shower had been forecasted that night, and you didn’t dare to miss it.

You and your best friend, Ben Solo, had snuck out against your Master’s wishes to watch the shower together. 

It was once in a lifetime, after all. 

You couldn’t have thought of a better person to sneak out with, you’d known him since you were just ten years old; not that you had many other friends in the academy regardless. 

The two of you never quite fit in with the other padawan learners, having earned reputations for being too reckless, too quick to anger, too ready for a fight. But you found solace in one another, always sparring, studying, or shirking off your responsibilities to go on some ill-advised adventure together. 

As the two of you grew, as did your fondness for one another. Master Luke began separating you more and more, fearing that you would build ties too strong to sever. 

Attachment, of course, was strictly forbidden. 

But that did little to stop you from stealing away to see the person whom you were closest with in the entire world whenever you could.

The two of you laughed like the foolish teenagers you were as you ran through the lush green field littered with wildflowers together hand-in-hand, searching for the perfect spot to watch the show.

Cresting the top of the hill, Ben suddenly dropped  to the ground, pulling you along with him as you tumbled down through the long grass. As you came to a stop, landing on top of him at the bottom of the hill, you playfully punched him in the arm. 

“You really ought to be more careful Ben! We could have gotten hurt!” you scolded him, still laughing like mad. 

“You know I wouldn’t let that happen!” he reassures you, laughing back at you as you shift off of him and take a seat next to him in the tall grass. 

The two of you spent a long time in comfortable silence, watching the meteors shoot over your heads. It was an awe-inspiring sight, countless comets of every colour followed by their glowing tails lighting up the entire sky above. It truly was beautiful, and you were still unsure if you’ve seen such beauty since. 

You spent hours just watching, enchanted by the ethereal lightshow. 

That is, until you looked towards Ben, and instead of watching the beauty of the stars, he was watching you. 

Your breath caught in your throat, and your heart swelled in an unfamiliar way as you looked at him, realising in that moment that he had grown up, no longer the awkward, lanky boy you knew as a child. 

His eyes sparkled innocently in the dim light, reflecting the colours of the stars. His lips were pink and parted, as if to ask something that was caught just on the tip of his tongue. His long raven hair blew in the gentle breeze, tousled by your tumble down the hill. 

For a split second, you envisioned running your fingers carefully through his soft locks to fix it for him before forcing yourself to look away. 

Cheeks hot and heart thumping in your chest, you tried to remind yourself of the rules of the Jedi you so desperately tried to uphold. You knew attachment was wrong, and love could only serve to destroy you. And yet, the idea of a life lived without ever knowing love, that kind of love, left a hole in your heart that ached for it. 

Clenching your fists so tightly your nails dug into the palms of your hands and closing your eyes, you tried your hardest to push your feelings down, to bottle them up and seal them away. 

The gentle feeling of Ben carefully, almost sheepishly placing a large hand to your left cheek and turning you to face him snapped you out of your quiet rumination. The sensation of his touch was warm and tingling, spreading goosebumps across your skin like wildfire. 

Your eyes met again, Ben measuring your reaction, looking hesitantly from your eyes to your lips and back again, as if he too could sense what you were feeling. 

Given the tender, vulnerable expression that spread across his countenance, you knew that he could. The rough pad of his thumb ghosted over your cheekbone, your skin feeling electrified as he touched it, the energies between you rich and palpable. 

“(Y/N)...” He whispered your name like a prayer. 

Before he could speak again, you would take his face between your hands, crashing your lips into his in a moment of reckless abandon. 

They’re soft and wet, the feeling of the kiss itself and the mixing of energies setting you both on fire. 

You lose yourself in it, all teeth and tongue and burning desire, kissing him over and over again. 

Ben is just about to lay you down right there, in the soft grass beneath the stars, before you force yourself to pull away. Sitting up pin straight and wiping the spit away from your lips, you were too ashamed to even look back at him. 

The world goes black. 

The next scene that plays is the one that has torn you apart for years. 

Standing before the devastated Jedi academy you called home for nearly your entire life, you watched as it burned to ash. Tears flowed in rivers down your cheeks as you sobbed in agony of all that was lost, all because of the boy you loved. 

Falling to your knees, Ben’s name tore its way out of your throat in a grief-stricken scream.

Eyes flying open, you jolt upright in bed. 

You’re then hit by the same cold realisation that it was all a dream, as you are every time you have that dream. Although, you suppose it's more of a recollection than a dream. 

Rubbing the sleep out of your eyes, you groan groggily as you spot the familiar silhouette of a man’s astral body across the room. 

“Ugh… Go away Kylo.” you moan, already becoming annoyed. 

Even if he wasn’t there physically, seeing him through the force hurt all the same. 

“You know I can’t, even if I wanted to.” he replies matter-of-factly, and you know it to be true. Whatever unseen force it is that binds you to each other, neither of you could control it. 

He haunts you like a ghost, torturing your very soul every time you would connect unannounced. His presence tonight is especially wounding, having been freshly reminded of the feelings you held for him despite everything. 

Throwing your covers off, you annoyedly begin to stoke the small fire pit in the centre of your hut, doing your best to ignore Kylo’s dark and magnetic presence looming in the shadows. 

“Where are you?” he asks abruptly, looking around the room and searching for any indicators of your location. 

You roll your eyes, finally looking in his face. His eyes are locked on you as he stands in the darkness of the room, the light of the flames illuminating his features. 

He’s every bit as handsome as you remember, all doe eyes and plump lips and strong nose. 

He’s gotten taller, and bulkier in terms of muscle than you remember, no doubt enhanced by his new training. Your heart strings tug painfully in your chest, and you remember why you avoid looking at him when this happens. 

“You know I can’t answer that.” you whisper solemnly in reply. 

“Why not?” he snaps back instantly.

“You know exactly why, Kylo Ren.” you sigh in irritation, spitting his name at him as if it tastes foul. You throw another log into the fire before standing and turning around, crossing your arms and doing your best to shut him out as your anger and frustrations build. 

“It would be so much easier if you would stop hiding, if you would just join me.” He continues, ignoring the vitriol in your tone and trying to coax the answer out of you. 

“I’m not hiding, Kylo. You just can’t find me. There’s a difference.” you scoff back at him, vaguely pleased when you hear him let out his own irritated sigh. 

You’ve been through this hundreds of times, your answers and his questions never changing. Everytime you speak to him, everytime you look at him, the void in your chest that calls to him grows wider. And with great pain every time, you deny him.

It’s torture, the purest form you could imagine. 

“You called to me. In your dream. I heard it.” he asserts in a gentler tone, as if it would change anything. You dig your nails into the skin of your arms in an attempt to temper the rage bubbling up inside of you. 

“I’m tired of fighting Kylo.” you sigh. “Can’t you see that? That’s why I’m here, in a hut in the fucking jungle.” you spit, an edge of hurt in your tone that you pray he doesn’t hear.

“Then why won’t you just come to me?” He tries desperately to persuade you. “I will take care of anything, everything you need. It could be so simple if you would just-” he starts on the same tirade that he starts every time you see each other. 

The fresh pain of the memories, the aching of your heart at seeing him, listening to the same argument; it’s finally all too much. The dam you’ve built to withhold your emotions finally breaks, your hurt finally overflowing as you spin on your heel to face him, screaming out the truth as you cut him off. 

“Because I love you, Ben! Because I love you, and you’ve destroyed everything else I’ve ever cared about! And I hate myself for it!” you bark at him through gritted teeth, hot tears welling up in your eyes and threatening to spill over.  

His brow furrows in frustration and shock as he yells back at you.

 “You know that isn’t the truth! I didn’t-” 

Clutching the sides of your head in frustration, you continue screaming, cutting him off once more. 

“Everyday I wake up and I’m forced back into the hell that is the realisation that this is my reality!” you gesture feverishly around the humble, run down hut in which you both stand, then between the two of you. “This is my reality, and I will never forgive you for it Ben.” your voice breaks, your anger spent and only leaving you with aching despair as the tears finally begin to fall. 

“I loved you, I really loved you.” you choke out between cries, the growing lump in your throat making it hard to speak. 

For once he’s silent, saying nothing as he looks upon you with widened eyes. 

He’s visibly taken aback, and the realisation finally hits you that you just admitted your love to him, and that you hadn’t called him by his name, his true name, since the incident that ripped you away from each other. 

He turns away from you, hiding the tears welling in his own eyes. 

“I don’t need your forgiveness.” he whispers, and you take one last look at him before he promptly vanishes. 

Left alone in the crippling emptiness of the hut you call home, you fall to your knees under the crippling weight of your sorrow, wracked with anguished sobs. 

Elsewhere in the galaxy, Kylo Ren wipes the stray tears from his face and steels his nerves, before throwing on his cloak and helmet. 

He could feel your presence even more acutely in the force now, the bond strengthened by your heated confession. It was certainly not one he had expected, but he had no doubt now that he would track you down.

All he would have to do is follow your signature. 

Your words were all the confirmation he needed as he stormed out of his personal quarters to gather a fleet, barking the orders to gather his knights at a commanding officer. 

If you refused to give yourself willingly to him, he would just have to take you. 

The next morning, you awaken suddenly to the sound of Stormtroopers blowing the door clean off of your hut. 

In an instant you leap to your feet, ready to defend yourself from any danger. Time moves in slow motion as you look out the door, the mass of troopers, fronted by the Knights of Ren  parting like the fabled red sea. 

Blood running cold, your heart drops to your feet as you lay eyes upon their leader who moves to the forefront, Kylo Ren.

You’re stricken with the awful, ice-cold revelation that he had used your bond in the force against you. 

It lead him right to you. 

Frantically turning to reach for a weapon, you’re cut short as a blaster hits you with a stun ray, rendering you unconscious. 

Your body falling to the floor with a soft thud, Kylo Ren strides over to where your body lay crumpled, just within the doorway, sighing regretfully. Crouching over you, he frowns as he softly brushes a lock of hair out of your face.

“It could have been so much easier.” he whispers like an apology, before carefully scooping you into his arms.

He takes a moment to look at you, admiring the beauty of his prize before carrying you onto his ship.

[enviedear]

Hi I love your neighbor!Ben oneshot!! Can I ask if you have anymore headcanons for him?

—aw hi nonnie! ofc i do, i'm always thinking about neighbor!ben. thank you for sending in an ask <3

request | masterlist

neighbor!BEN SOLO...

— he is most definitely the kind of neighbor to knock on your door and ask for sugar or some shit. he always insists it's for leia, but he won't admit that he's the one telling his mom that he'll run over to yours and ask.

"hey neighbor, mom wanted to know if you have any powdered sugar?" "gosh ben, i just gave you some."

— he loves spending his free time in his garage, wide open, blaring music and working on his (and han's) car. i think these songs would be frequently playing from his speaker, 1 | 2 | 3

— insists on mowing your grass, even though your dad can do it just fine. no, ben likes having an excuse to strut around shirtless in your yard. he also will never accept payment for it.

"i can't let you pay me, sir. it's really no trouble."

— when he and his parents get invited over for dinner he'll make sure to ask you about all things poli-sci (he loves to bring up his minor all the time), headlining legal news, and nineteeth century philosophers. if you can keep up with him, he'll get sardonic and try to get you to fumble. if you're lost, he'll be subtly demeaning and solipsistic.

"let me guess? you think dostoevsky had the world figured out don't you?" "yes. why? do you want me to follow the teachings of comte as religiously as you?" he'd grin, "i'm just making conversation, kid."

— ben would always go on night runs, and on days he actually gets off on time, they end up coenciding with the time you walk your dog. he'll find so much joy in catching up to you and annoying the absolute shit out of you.

"you and cujo should really speed up, i can't jog the entire time." "no one asked you to stay with us."

— on the night run note, one evening he'd see a 'missing dog' poster that barely resembles yours and he'd accuse you of being a dog napper.

"holy shit kid, you can't steal people's dogs!" "shut up solo! i haven't stolen anyone's dog." "oh yeah? then why does this ankle biter look exactly like the one in the picture?"

— he really would just do any stupid or barely thought-out thing to get your attention

— he has no personal space, at least when it comes to you. he'll brush against you no question to grab something, he'll let his hands rest on your shoulders when he's behind you, and he'll cut your steak for you without even giving you a questioning glance.

"i can do some things myself you know." you'd groan, when he begins to cut your rib-eye. only for your mother to pipe in, "honey he's being nice! ignore her ben!"

— ben would constantly be invited to family trips, dinners, and events. especially when your parents catch wind that leia and han aren't home much. so expect ben solo to come along for a day trip into the city with you and your parents.

"you don't have to follow me around. i can navigate a museum on my own." "chill out, kid. i'm just trying to get a good eye on the best installation." you'd pause, "are you... talking about me?" with a smirk he'd reply, "you'd like that, wouldn't you."

— you'd take up a little job tending to leia's garden when she's away, and ben will always make sure to keep you in his eyes. he likes the way you look in overalls and his old batman potting gloves.

— after you're done in the garden he'll give you a glass of homemade lemonade with a sprig of mint. he lets you poke fun of him for it.

"all for me, solo?" "hmm, who else?"

— just like ben, you refuse to be paid for your little side gig. but ben will always leave a crisp twenty in your mailbox the day after. you take them and keep them in a red envelope with the words, 'from hot neighbor', written on the flap in sharpie.

han would catch him doing it one day and say, "can't pay yourself a girlfriend, son." ben would just roll his eyes, "it's not even like that. i'm just trying to not be a cheapskate like you." "sure, son. whatever you say."

[cocotierz]

A catalog of all my completed and ongoing fics. These are all explicit, please check ratings and tags.

reylo

oneshots

all the right reasons

Rey Palpatine has a big crush on Professor Solo. When she leaves her diary behind after wasting his office hour, Ben sees just how much he has to teach her.

baby blues

Rey becomes pregnant after a one-night stand. Ben decides to do the honourable thing.

rain on me

The state of California has put restrictions on water usage per household due to drought but Rey’s roommate Ben has a solution. What’s some platonic co-showering between friends?

signals crossing

It's a lot easier to accidentally chrome cast porn to your neighbours TV than one would like

loving you is cherry pie

Rey Niima knows for a fact her pies are nothing short of delectable. So why is it that neighboring criminal defense attorney and resident asshole Ben Solo keeps ordering slices just to pick at it without taking so much as a bite?

don't let it stop

Ben and Rey are no strangers to competition, so when Ben proposes they see who can resist the other for the longest, they both get extremely creative to make the other break.

multichapter - completed

sign of the times

Fifteen-year-old Rey Niima can’t stand her neighbour Ben Solo. So you can imagine her surprise when she wakes up fifteen years in the future in bed with him — especially when he is calling himself her husband.

delivered

The guy Rey hooked up with at that frat party is turning out to be weird, pushy, with no respect for boundaries. And yet…

ask for more

Rey is single and wants Ben as her Alpha. Ben is hung up on some nameless Omega. They make a mutually beneficial and strictly platonic arrangement.

talk to me boy

In which Rey is a romance author, Ben is her editor, and Rey needs help with a sex scene.

multichapter - wip

queen of disaster

Crown Princess Regina and First Son of the United States Benjamin Solo hate each other. Fate, it seems, has other plans.

once upon a dream

Rey and her virgin sisters live and dance by the lakes, giving offerings to the gods. That is until the demon prince Kylo Ren takes a liking to her and steals her away to the underworld, to be his wife.

cool about it

Rey treats her dms with a list actor Ben Solo like a diary of sorts, sending him rants, memes, nudes, and recipes. It’s not like he’ll ever see it…right?

playing house

Rey Niima became an au pair in order to sightsee and improve her French. She did not become an au pair to pine after her brooding host and grow attached to his adorable daughter.

series

loser ben

drive through

Sixteen-year-old Ben Solo isn't used to pretty, kind of scary girls climbing on top of him and taking what they want - that is until he meets Rey.

video games

Rey really wants the snail Squishmallow at the arcade. She also really wants to suck her boyfriends cock.

migwen

oneshots

if you're seeking heaven (then you want to come and get it)

The girl next door is loud and arrogant and only a couple months into legal territory. Miguel shouldn’t be wanting to fuck her like some starved old man.

[swanimagines]

STAR WARS AO3 SERIESES

EVERYTHING FOR STAR WARS

PREQUELS

Anakin Skywalker

Obi-Wan Kenobi (coming)

ORIGINALS

Luke Skywalker

Han Solo

SEQUELS

Poe Dameron

Finn

Kylo Ren/Ben Solo

ROGUE ONE

Cassian Andor

STAR WARS: JEDI GAMES

Cal Kestis

MISC

Preferences

(Any of the other characters don't have any requests written nor pending as for now, so I'm unable to have serieses for them as AO3 requires you to have at least one oneshot written to be able to add it to a series, and I can't promise serieses for characters who don't have requests pending/I have no ideas of my own for them)

For anyone who's concerned, THESE ARE NOT ONESHOT COLLECTIONS, they are made using AO3's "series" feature.

If you want to be informed about new fics for Star Wars or its individual characters, create an AO3 account and subscribe or bookmark any of those serieses listed above. There are buttons at the top right corner for those, or on top on mobile. I do not do Tumblr taglists anymore.

Also, if you're wondering, requests are ALWAYS open and you're welcome to leave one or multiple. Just remember to read my rules and pick a request type from this list.

[kylowritten]

Masterlist of Works

If the Slipper Fits: Nobody wants to be the woman whose foot fits that slipper. A Cinderella/One Thousand and One Nights mashup. Find it on Ao3 here

Part One Part Seven Part Thirteen

Part Two Part Eight Part Fourteen

Part Three Part Nine

Part Four Part Ten

Part Five Part Eleven

Part Six Part Twelve

Kylo’s POV: Part Nine

Oneshots:

Grief of a Mother

Prompt Exchange with @juniperwoodwell:

Why Me?

Requests (ADCU):

Close Quarters - Matt the Radar Technician

Work Friends - Matt the Radar Technician, Ben Solo

Requests are open!!

[typewriteringalaxy]

fanwork creators self rec, or your five favourite fics/art/podcast etc

thank you for the tag @letters-to-rosie 💕 your answer reminded me that The Fire Next Time has been on my tbr for too long and I need to rectify that lol. anyway here we go in chronological order

everything's better with a friend (Ekko/Jinx, E, 7/7)

my magnum opus so far! more than 85,000 words of an AU where Powder doesn't joins Silco but faces many of the struggles Jinx does. This fic just flowed right after watching Arcane, it was a joy both in creation and readers' reception. I'm particularly happy with Powder's pov and the relationship's progression. Healing isn't linear, and love alone isn't enough to heal, though it does help. That ended up being the theme, and I managed it fairly well in the story, as well as a happy, domestic timebomb ending💕

(I did hint at a sequel of sorts, and the idea still spins in my head. Maybe by the end of summer?)

With Less Inhibition (Astoria Greengrass/Blaise Zabini, E, 5/7)

This one can be read on its own despite being an AU of another fic, The Platinum Collar. Honestly I prefer it from TPC: Blaise's pov and the focus on their friendship's development made the story better. Astoria's letters were also very fun to write. With both of them minor characters in canon (and in a not respectable canon to boot), I had a lot of creative freedom in their characterisation, so this ship is very dear to me. Also this fic was written with @hypernovaesx 's love, enthusiasm and moodboards (Blastoria being our gondola💕) and I love it all the more for it. I haven't left it at a cliffhanger, rather the complete opposite. (And someday I will finish it.)

touch as a form of comfort (Tandy Bowen/Tyrone Johnson, E, oneshot)

I wrote this one after watching Cloak & Dagger Season 2, whose ending made me so happy and thus the fic is a happy memory too. It's short and sweet, going along with the finale's wholesome vibe. I hope to share longer fics for this ship too.

howling hearts (Rey/Ben Solo, T, 7/7)

I returned to my roots with this one lol. First time taking part in the RFFA Valentine's Exchange, I'm happy to have completed the fic within the deadline, and the Beauty and the Beast prompt with Rey as the Beast was really inspiring. Thus I wrote a feral, angry Beast Rey, a nerdy smuggler Ben Solo, a pack of Sith Wolves as the Knights of Ren, and had the opportunity to toy a bit with the reasoning behind the Beast's transformations. It was fun.

party girl (multiship, E, oneshot)

An exploration of Jinx that I'm proud of particularly since in all my other fics of her I either wrote her as Powder or somewhat downplayed her canon viciousness and sheer chaos. And she's a damn difficult character to pin down. Parings include: Jinx/Thieram, Caitlyn/Jinx, Ekko/Jinx.

tagging, if you'd like to play:

@hypernovaesx (if you're still on tumblr; you know I loved your stories before I started writing mine and I love you💕)

@blueinsomnia (curious about your favourite Firelight Stories)

@linearao3 (I've admired your writing from Kohelet to Child Ballad, curious about your favourites)

[ao3feed--reylo]

My Turn Now

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/r1C63Bh

by the_tenderest

When Rey’s drunk tweet sets off alarms for Ben Solo, he decides to drive down to the city to check on his baby.

Words: 7371, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, Star Wars - All Media Types

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M

Characters: Rey (Star Wars), Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Ben Solo, Rose Tico, Poe Dameron, Finn (Star Wars), Kaydel Ko Connix, Armitage Hux

Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Porn with Feelings, Drunk Rey (Star Wars), Protective Ben Solo, Possessive Ben Solo, Dry Humping, Hotel Sex, Breeding Kink, marriage kink, Unprotected Sex, Very Ethical Ben Solo But Also Very Horny, Feral Rey, Caretaking, Light Dom/sub, Light Ddlg Undertones, Light Voyeurism, Fluff and Smut, Lovers to lovers, rey has the zoomies, spaghetti sauce marking, i am apparently actually capable of writing a oneshot!!

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/r1C63Bh

[twin-books]

Since I know if I ever actually do get asks they're probably going to be purely Miraculous related... I'm just gonna leave a little list of other media I actually enjoy not entirely related to the Miraculous show because I am really quite done with talking about the show since it seems to only delve into negatives for me and contrary to popular belief, I do actually prefer to talk about what I like:

Miraculous PV (I am completely fine with this since there's no real actual media to make me upset)

Link Click (awesome freaking show)

Sonic the Hedgehog (comics, games [haven't played many due to lack of ability to do so but I still know a lot about most of them], shows)

Free! (yes the swimming anime, I really like the darn swimming anime)

IDOLiSH7 (I've only seen the anime and I am just finishing season 3, I doubt my phone has room for the game)

Rising of the Shield Hero (sure, season 2 was iffy but it came back around near the end, aside from a few setbacks in season 3 it was great too)

Takt: op Destiny (I've only seen the anime, I don't even know if I can get the game and, again, I doubt my phone has room)

Genshin Impact (been busy with work so have only gotten as far in the story to like the first arc of Sumeru so any Fontaine characters I would not freaking know about I only played one event for them and only got a basic idea of how they work)

Tears of Themis (Am no where near finishing the main story we have so far but I've read almost every card I have so I got a pretty good idea of these idiots)

Mr Love: Queen's Choice (Also ain't anywhere near finishing this story but I still love them, I have also seen the anime which kind of sucked but I digress, at least it was fun)

Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (I've seen all of this, including the movie and I adore it)

Ben 10 (I have seen all 4 previous shows before the reboot, Ben 10, Ben 10: Alien Force, Ben 10: Ultimate Alien, and Ben 10: Omniverse. I have not seen the reboot beyond the first two episodes which I did not enjoy. I am still thinking about trying but it's hard)

The Grimm Variations (this was freaking great, I freaking love fairy tales)

Raven Saga (Webtoon, highly recommend)

Operation: True Love (also a Webtoon I recommend if you like those fun little romance dramas)

My Summer of You (a manga I very much freaking enjoy and I have every volume so far)

Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur (I adore it and have finish what is out so far)

Oneshot (freaking brilliant game, loved every second of it)

Ever After High (I watched the entire series and own almost all the books, though I've only read a few through)

Alien Stage (that series of music videos which has piqued my interest fully. Plus music being used as a story is my jam)

Solo Leveling (still haven't finished season 1 but I'm trying! I have the game, haven't read the manwha unfortunately) Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous and Jurassic World: Chaos Theory (both were way too much fun) Also if anyone has any good cartoon/anime/donghua or any other form of animation to recommend please feel free to tell me. I try to avoid anything with angels in it and anything with demons is a bit iffy (but you can certainly try).

Give me a character

and I’ll break their ass down:

How I feel about this character

All the people I ship romantically with this character

My non-romantic OTP for this character

My unpopular opinion about this character

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

[clqoo]

working on a reylo oneshot (i think oneshot, ik it's not gonna be long.) rn and it's friends to lovers modern au and i'm very excited i think it's such a cute idea

[lyon-amore]

⚠️ATENCIÓN⚠️ El contenido de este Oneshot especial por el cumpleaños de Macie por adelantado tiene ligero spicy. Hace años que no escribo algo así por temas personales, así que espero que os guste aunque no sea tan explícito, intento regresar poco a poco. Es una secuela del oneshot 'Brindemos por los corazones rotos'. Está inspirada en la canción de Ana Mena 'Ben & Jerry's'.

    Había pasado meses desde que había dejado atrás Europa y viajado a Estados Unidos para alejarse de aquel mal momento.     Macie se trasladó a California, como corresponsal.     Por un tiempo vivió con sus abuelos hasta encontrar un bonito piso cerca de la playa. Todas las mañanas tenía una vista perfecta del mar.     Para su amiga había sido duro que ella se mudara, pero había comprendido su decisión, Macie necesitaba una vida alejada de todos esos malos recuerdos y eso significaba marcharse.     Sus nuevos compañeros al principio habían tratado de burlarse de ella por su conocimiento en inglés, pero en cuanto la joven demostró que también sabía dominarlo, fueron ellos los que recibieron la burla de vuelta.     Se adaptó rápido y se centraba mejor en el trabajo y en solo hacer amistades, prefería esperar a ese hombre adecuado y dejar de salir con cualquier si no estaba segura.

    Ah, pero ¿Cómo hacerlo si desde aquella noche en aquel bar conoció a un joven misterioso que no parecía querer salir de su cabeza?     Hacía pocos días, por las noches soñaba con él y con aquellos ojos verdes que la observaban como si fuera lo único que existía en el mundo, le susurraba al oído con esa voz profunda palabras hermosas y ella se dejaba llevar como si fuera una droga que deseaba.     Y todas las mañanas, se levantaba como si aquella noche pasional hubiera sucedido.     En cierto modo, se sentía un poco mal por aquello, no conocía su nombre ni sabía quién era ¿Estaba bien en fantasear de ese modo con él cuando lo único que habían compartido era un vaso?     Se llevó la mano a la cara, ardiendo y sudando. Quizás estaba mal, pero si él no se enteraba ¿Qué más daba? No era como si se fuera a encontrar con él.

     Por mucho que lo deseara.

    Encendió el móvil y miles de mensajes le entraron felicitándola. Su cumpleaños. Al menos era una buena excusa para beber aquel día.    — ¿Y este quién es?—arqueó una ceja al ver un número que nunca había visto felicitándole su cumpleaños ¿Sería su exnovio con un nuevo número de teléfono tratando de recuperarla tras aquella noche? Esperaba que no y que solamente fuera un error.     Además, si aquel chico al que le dio su número no le había enviado un mensaje hasta ahora, sería extraño. --------------------

Macie Perdona, pero, quién eres?

87432 Cómo que quién soy? Minerva, soy John, recuerdas?

Macie Lo siento, número equivocado 😅

87432 ?? AY! PERDONA! El último número lo escribí mal 😅 Ya no te molesto más

Macie No te preocupes Y suerte con la chica 🤭

87432 Gracias ☺️ --------------------

    Soltó una risa y dejó el móvil en la cama, mientras, su conejo Henry saltó a la cama hasta llegar a su cara, olisqueándola.    —Debería levantarme de la cama y dejar de soñar, ¿Verdad? —le acarició la cabeza con cariño y él movió las orejas como si la hubiera entendido— Hoy será un día largo, Henry…

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

    Le había costado obtener información falsa, pero lo había conseguido gracias a un buen trato.     No es que la seguridad en Estados Unidos le pareciera menor, pero al menos ya no tenía que preocuparse por aquellos que le buscaban en Alemania. Esperaba que ninguno de aquellos agentes descubrieran que se había marchado.     Y aunque se había alejado para olvidarse de aquella chica que ya no ocupaba su mente, otra lo hacía. Una rubia de un marrón cálido que conoció en un bar y le atrajo de manera misteriosa. Jake recordaba que había dicho de venir a aquel país, pero ¿Qué posibilidades había de encontrarla? Tampoco estaba ahí para buscar aquella chica. Macie. Recordaba su nombre por el camarero que la nombró. Recordaba aquel número de teléfono.    —Cuatro, cero, tres, cinco, seis, cinco…     De vez en cuando lo recordaba, aunque no quisiera hacerlo, pronunciarlo le calmaba. Y eso le daba vergüenza.     Se frotó la cara, tratando de despejarse. Llevaba días que se quedaba dormido por las noches y soñaba con ella, algo que no se esperaba. Sueños en los que por un momento se dejaba llevar por aquel impulso y la tumbaba en su cama y-    —Agh, mierda… —apretó los dientes con fuerza, queriendo borrar esa imagen de la cabeza— Será mejor que siga.     Se alojaba en un hotel de bajo precio, cerca del mar.     El lugar no era tampoco lujoso, pero no necesitaba demasiado.     Buscaba algún buen lugar abandonado en el país para alojarse y poder instalar el nuevo equipo. Había estado meses haciendo tratos por internet y subastas para conseguir buenos materiales. Cuando le preguntaban la dirección, siempre decía que lo dejasen en la oficina de correo de la dirección que él proporcionaba. No era nunca buena idea una reunión ni tampoco que se lo enviasen en persona.     Incluso había usado varios nombres falsos obtenerlos. Estaba volviendo a olvidarse de su identidad de nuevo. Suponía que así era mejor. Regresar a la normalidad que antes tenía para no atarse a nada de nuevo.

   Despedirse del nombre de Jake iba a ser duro tras haberlo recuperado hace tiempo.

    Volver a perder su identidad era más seguro para todos los que le conocían y para él.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

    Había reído, cantado y celebrado su cumpleaños con sus nuevos amigos. Había soplado las velas y sacado fotos. Por desgracia, sabían que al día siguiente tenían que trabajar de nuevo, así que no podían quedarse hasta tarde.     Le habían dicho a Macie de celebrarlo en fin de semana, pero ya le había prometido a sus abuelos que lo celebrarían con ellos. Y ella no quería romper la promesa de las dos personas que más quería.

    Se quedó esperando el Uber que acababa de pedir y le tocaba esperar en el frío de la noche.     Un amigo se había ofrecido a llevarla a su casa, pero había reconocido sus intenciones. Creía que tenía una oportunidad con ella y prefirió abandonar el hábito de dar falsas esperanzas para preocuparse más por su trabajo y no tener una relación amorosa con un compañero.    — ¿Cuarenta y cinco minutos? —soltó un resoplido, molesta.     No quería cancelar ahora que ya lo había pedido y ver si otro Uber estaba cerca. Y al menos, la vista de aquel lado de la playa tampoco era tan mala como desde su piso.     Se abrazó a sí misma, frotándose los brazos. Paseaba también de un lado a otro para entrar en calor,  el sonido de sus tacones hacían un leve ruido en el suelo.

   <<Ahora es cuando me arrepiento de no haber aceptado que me llevasen a casa.>>

    Decidió distraerse mirando las redes sociales. Su amiga y su marido estaban preparando el primer cumpleaños de su hija. Y ella se lo iba a perder. Agradecía que al menos le hubiera comprado el regalo y enviado un mes antes para que no llegase tarde.     Parecía que ambas estaban bien en sus vidas con lo que siempre habían soñado desde que se conocieron en la universidad.    —Macie… —escuchó su nombre siendo pronunciado de manera dulce.     Giró la cabeza para ver a un misterioso encapuchado observándola con unos brillantes ojos verdes.     Su corazón se aceleró al reconocerlos, aunque no pensaba que se acordase de ella. Vio que tenía una bolsa en la mano ¿Significaba que estaba viviendo cerca?    —Mi compañero de bebidas —le sonrió llena de felicidad al verle, como si una pequeña parte de su anterior vida hubiera regresado y echaba de menos.    Jake al ver cómo la joven le miraba, sintió calor por la cara. Agradecía que la capucha y la mascarilla le tapase el sonrojo.     Observó cómo iba vestida. Un bonito vestido dorado hacía que resplandeciera bajó la luz.     Poco a poco iba bajando la vista, observando que podía ver sus piernas estilizadas por los tacones.     Ya no solo la cara empezaba a arder.

    <<No debería haber bajado la vista, maldición.>>

    Decidió centrarse en su cara, pero solo lo empeoró al ver sus ojos cálidos y sus labios rojos.     Su cabello estaba un poco más corto de lo que él recordaba, pero le gustaba cómo le quedaba ¿O en realidad le gustaba todo lo que estaba viendo?    —Vaya, me has recordado a pesar de mi camuflaje —aunque no la estaba mirando por vergüenza, estaba sonriendo. Se alegraba de verla, no podía negarlo.     Y era mejor que Macie no supiera todo lo que había pensado de ella.    — ¿Cómo olvidar unos ojos así? —se preguntó si no estaba siendo demasiado coqueta con un hombre que solo había conocido de una noche, pero no podía evitarlo: Era ÉL. El hombre que la había flechado y ni siquiera sabía si nombre.     Le observó detenidamente. Ahora que estaba de pie, le parecía más grande que lo recordaba y eso que con tacones veía que llegaba a sus labios, algo tentador. Evitó el morderse los labios al ver sus manos, unos dedos largos que seguramente la harían perder la cabeza. Sus piernas le temblaban de solo imaginar las cosas que le encantaría hacer con él.

    <<Cálmate Macie o lo vas a asustar con la forma de mirarlo.>>

    Jake soltó una pequeña risa, nervioso. Muy directa, debía de admitirlo.    —Aunque yo soy la sorprendida, no pensé que tú te acordarías de mí —Macie trató de no sonar resentida. Podía ser que de verdad aquel hombre no estaba interesado en ella y por eso nunca se puso en contacto con ella, no tenía por qué enfadarse a pesar de que se acordaba de su nombre—. No digo que no me alegre, pero es bastante extraño.      Vio cómo finalmente se bajó la mascarilla, mostrando una sonrisa. Y de nuevo, como aquella noche cayó rendida.    —Recuerdo las cosas importantes —no pudo evitar en decir aquellas palabras, y en cierto modo, decía la verdad. Ella le ayudó a olvidarse de alguien a quien creía querer, pero lo empeoró al pensar solamente en ella.    — ¿Tan importante como para no llamarme? —arqueó una ceja, ladeando un poco la cabeza.     Jake apartó la mirada, viendo que estaba dolida. No podía simplemente contarle la verdad, ya estaba incluso perdiendo el tiempo estando ahí hablando con ella. Al menos era un tiempo maravilloso.

    Examinó sus brazos, viendo cómo su piel estaba con las indicaciones de que tenía frío, aquello le preocupó un poco.    —Quizás deberías regresar a casa antes de que te enfermes-    —Estás evitando mi pregunta.     Se mordió la lengua, viendo que no lo había dejado pasar. Quizás si maquillaba la verdad, podría librarse de aquel enfado.    —Las cosas de mi vida estaban un poco alteradas como para llamarte, créeme que a veces —inspiró profundamente, mirándola a los ojos. Se sentía perdido ante su mirada, como si pudiera contarle todo si se lo pidiera—deseaba hacerlo, pero no podía.     Macie rio, colocándose el cabello detrás de la oreja. Parecía que sonaba sincero, pero se notaba que algo ocultaba y tampoco quería indagar demasiado si no quería contárselo.    —Pues al menos espero que todo esté bien en tu vida ahora —trató de ser comprensiva y no rencorosa, ya le había dicho que recordaba las cosas importantes, lo que significaba que era importante para él de alguna forma.     Y eso que solamente hablaron una noche.    —Bueno, pues me he alegrado de ver-    —Podemos ir a ese bar —las palabras de Jake salieron solas de su boca, señalando el local que tenían detrás de ellos. Quizás estaba esperando un rechazo, pero tenía ganas de volver a hablar con ella.     Macie giró levemente, observando el pequeño bar que había. Miró después su móvil, recordando el coche que había pedido.     Hacía un par de minutos se habría negado en cancelarlo, pero ahora no lo dudó un segundo. Iba a cancelarlo y quedarse un poco más.    —Claro, me encantaría —no pudo evitar en sonreírle como si hubiera recibido un regalo. Estaba creyendo que quizás en los cumpleaños podían suceder cosas inexplicables.     Pero Jake tampoco se quedaba atrás. Él sonrió con alivió de que aceptase.     Con una pequeña exclamación, se bajó la cremallera de su sudadera, colocándosela después en los hombros a la joven. Cuando rozó su hombro, notó su piel helada comparado a cómo él estaba caliente. Solo que en ese momento no sabía si lo estaba porque había estado abrigado o por el efecto que ella le causaba.     La sintió cálida y no iba a negarlo, estaba disfrutando de que oliera a él. Cuando subió la cremallera, aprovechó para olerla un poco. Se sintió atraída en aquel momento por el olor de su colonia ¿Así que era así como él olía? Lo recordaría para futuros sueños.    —Gracias —recordó entonces que tenía que cancelar el Uber, aquel gesto la había distraído—, ves andando, te sigo.     El hombre asintió, y ella mientras le seguía cancelaba el coche. Se sentía un poco mal, pero esas oportunidades no aparecían todos los días.

     El bar tenía un estilo marítimo, decorado como si fuera un barco pirata. Los clientes hablaban de manera animada mientras la música de fondo los acompañaba.     Se sentaron alejados de todos, como si buscasen intimidad. Jake dejó la bolsa llena de la compra de paquetes de café en el suelo, mientras que Macie dejó su bolso en la silla.     Aunque lo que Jake quería era llamar la atención lo menos posible, ya lo estaba haciendo mostrando su aspecto a todos por ella. Estaba siendo descuidado, pero hacía años que no se sentía tan bien siendo él mismo.     El camarero se acercó y pidieron dos cervezas, para después quedarse de nuevo solos.    — ¿Y cómo es que no llevas al menos una chaqueta para el frío? —Jake cruzó los brazos por encima de la mesa. Macie se distrajo un momento observándolos, imaginando cómo sería ser abrazada por ellos— Por la noche refresca bastante.    —Llevo meses aquí y a veces me olvido que las noches son frías —agradeció al camarero por las cervezas, dando un pequeño sorbo, para después continuar—, supongo que es porque tampoco es que salga demasiado, hoy es especial porque es mi cumpleaños.    —Oh, entonces… —Jake levantó el vaso, acercándolo al centro— Feliz cumpleaños, Macie.     La joven brindó, escuchando el hermoso choque de vasos.     Jake no apartaba la mirada de ella, las luces que imitaban a unas velas hacían que el ambiente fuera ¿Romántico? Estaba cayendo de nuevo y no sabía si era algo bueno.    — ¿Y qué haces tú aquí? —Macie le miró con curiosidad, pero una sonrisa pícara apareció por sus labios— No estarás aquí porque dije que vendría también ¿Acaso eres un acosador?    —N-no, yo no-     La joven empezó a reírse, haciendo que Jake se sonrojara.    —Estaba tomándote el pelo —apoyó la barbilla en su mano, mirándolo con diversión—. No sueles bromear mucho, ¿Verdad?    —No tengo tiempo para hacerlo, ni la compañía adecuada —ahora fue ella la que sonrojó al ver cómo la miraba cuando él dijo aquellas palabras. Fueron con una entonación dulce, ocultando una pequeña sonrisa—. He venido para alejarme de mi antigua vida y empezar de cero —una verdad y una mentira mezclada, lo suficiente para no meterla demasiado en su mundo—, aunque el precio sea alejarme de mis hermanas.    — ¿Entonces estás solo? —el hombre asintió, sorprendiendo a Macie— ¿No tienes familia aquí?    —No, nadie —le dio vueltas al vaso, antes de dar un trago. Pensó en cómo había abandonado a Lilly y a Hannah, pero más a Lilly, con todo lo que había ocurrido y no se había atrevido a verla para consolarla. No se veía como un buen hermano mayor—. Pero tampoco es que salga mucho, estoy ocupado.    —Mhm, ya veo…     Macie mantuvo la mirada, viendo aquella expresión triste. Aún no sabía su nombre, ni siquiera se lo había preguntado. Se arriesgaba de que le estuviera engañando y quizás fuera de verdad un acosador, no sería la primera vez que existieran esos casos.     Pero arriesgarse no la detenía. Eso y quizás su poco sentido del peligro.    — ¿Así que tienes hermanas?    —Sí, por parte de padre —para él, era un poco alivio hablar del tema. Solo dos personas sabían la verdad y por alguna razón quería que ella también lo supiera. Le daba una extraña sensación de complicidad. No sabía si era buena idea admitir que eso le gustaba—, aunque él no lo sabe.    — ¿Y eso te molesta o…    —No, no me molesta, creo que es mejor así —levantó las cejas, con una expresión de indiferencia—, no ha estado presente en mis treinta y dos años de vida, no me molesta.     La rubia asintió, dándole la razón ¿Para qué preocuparse de un hombre que posiblemente engañó a su mujer? Pero le era adorable que se preocupase por sus hermanas, eso significaba que a ellas no le guardaba rencor.     Prefirió no preguntar por su madre, dado que no la había nombrado. El nivel alto de complicidad aún no lo tenían y seguramente era meter el dedo en la llaga.     Jake sintió un pequeño peso quitándose de encima, algo que le molestaba desde hacía mucho tiempo. Y por alguna razón, quería que ella lo supiera, como si quisiera abrirse a ella.

    Fue entonces que recordó aquella conversación en el bar, donde la vio con aquellos ojos húmedos. Se preguntaba si el tema de su exnovio había quedado zanjado y si había encontrado a otra persona, si salía con alguien.     Tragó saliva con fuerza al pensarlo, como si tuviera una oportunidad con ella.     Y, como ella se había interesado, tenía que dar el paso e interesarse también por lo que hace mucho estaba pensando.    — ¿Qué pasó al final con tu exnovio? Si se me permite preguntarlo —quiso empezar comprobando si quería hablarlo, así que quiso ser lo más educado posible.     No estaba seguro que ella quisiera hablarlo, pero al menos habría tenido esa oportunidad de preguntarlo y aceptar la respuesta que le diese.     Macie soltó aire con exageración, dando toques al vaso. Ni ella sabía cómo empezar.    —El momento más incómodo de mi vida —dio un trago tratando de buscar consuelo en el alcohol, recordando aquel momento—, pensó que habíamos vuelto y estaba todo el tiempo pegado a mí de una manera… Ugh… No quiero ni recordarlo.    —Disculpa si te he incomodado al pensar en él-    —Oh, no, no eres tú el culpable —colocó su mano en la de él, queriendo tener un pequeño contacto—, me alegra que al menos te hayas preocupado por mi asunto.     Jake de manera disimulada miró su mano. Estaba caliente a comparación de cómo estaba antes, el cálido lugar y el de su sudadera había hecho efecto.    — ¿Cómo no estarlo? No puedo quitarme de la cabeza cómo estabas aquella noche.    — ¿De verdad? —no quiso que se notase, pero su entonación feliz la había delatado al saber que él había estado pensando en ella.     Nervioso por haber confesado aquello, Jake dio un trago largo a su cerveza, mientras que Macie ocultó una pequeña risa detrás de su mano. Cada vez estaba enamorándose más de aquel desconocido que al igual que él, no se había olvidado de aquella noche.    — ¿Es raro si digo que me alegra de que lo admitas?     Jake miró cómo en aquel momento le estaba mirando. Era como si su mirada le estuviera pidiendo algo más que no era capaz de comprender. O quizás es que no quería arriesgarse más.     Pasó su lengua por los labios, saboreando el rastro de cerveza que había quedado.     Ante ese gesto, Macie se mordió el labio, imaginando poder besarlo en aquel instante. Si se controlaba en aquel momento era por educación. No parecía que él quisiera dar un paso, así que respetaría ese muro invisible que había en ambos.    —Todo lo contrario, creo que, de cierto modo, me gusta que no me veas como un tipo raro —el hombre trató de relajarse al ver también su gesto, estaba demasiado nervioso como para pensar con claridad.    —Más que raro, te veo como un misterio que quiero desvelar.    —Y eso te encanta.    —Vivo por ello, así que, si no quieres que acabe por descubrir cada secreto que ocultas, será mejor que te alejes de mí, Mister Misterioso.     Cuando Jake rio ante ese apodo, Macie sintió cómo si su corazón fuera a salirse del pecho. La expresión de felicidad que él tenía en su cara le entraba ganas de sacarle una foto y de tenerla de fondo de pantalla. Nunca antes había visto a alguien tan feliz.     En cierto modo, le causaba tristeza ¿Cuánto hacía que no se reía de esa manera?    —Y… ¿Hay alguien en tu vida ahora? —Jake trató de recomponerse, cada vez más intrigado por ella.    —Estoy soltera —Macie se puso a jugar con el cinto de la sudadera, enredándolo en su dedo índice. Podía ver el interés en sus ojos, pero antes quería confirmar algo— ¿Y tú? ¿Lograste sacarte a aquella mujer con otra?     Jake se sintió avergonzado, porque claramente la chica era ella. No sabía cómo admitirlo, ¿Le gustaría saberlo? ¿Qué esos meses había estado en su cabeza?

    Sabía que Macie estaba esperando por una respuesta, pero él no podía dejar de mirarla, imaginando qué era lo siguiente que pasaría sí se lo decía. Eran muchas las posibilidades y quizás deseaba que una sucediera. Era una tentación que deseaba poder obtener.    —Hay alguien que lleva en mi cabeza bastante tiempo —se inclinó un poco hacia delante, susurrando. Macie también hizo lo mismo, estando ambos  unos centímetros del uno del otro—. Hace que me desconcentre cuando intento trabajar, es una mujer que me ha vuelto loco.     Macie tragó saliva, tratando de controlarse en aquel momento por esa cercanía. Deseaba estirar sus brazos y besarlo, pero jugar con él a provocarlo era más divertido. Quería ver cuánto podría soportar.    — ¿Podrías decir que estás enamorado? —susurró la joven, deslizando la mano a la suya, acariciándole con la yema de los dedos el dorso de su mano.     Un escalofrío le recorrió a Jake por todo el cuerpo al notarla. Sus leves caricias le causaban un efecto relajante a la vez que excitante.     No sabía cuánto tiempo iba a durar así.    —Si es así lo que se siente cuando te enamoras, el que solo deseas tenerla para ti y querer cuidarla, entonces digamos que sí.     Si eso no era una confirmación, entonces es que estaba notando las señales equivocadas.     Pero ya debía arriesgarse.     Macie se desabrochó la sudadera, dejándola en el respaldo de la silla.    —Voy al baño —se levantó y deslizó la mano por su pecho, subiendo hasta su hombro.     Jake cerró los ojos, nervioso con aquella caricia.     Se giró para ver cómo se iba, y se preguntó si era buena idea en seguirla.

   <<Si no lo hago ahora, quizás nunca…>>

    Se levantó de la silla, buscando el baño.     No sabía si era una buena idea entrar, dado que era el baño de mujeres.     Unas chicas abrieron la puerta y fingió estar esperando, viendo a Macie dentro, mirando hacia la puerta. Le hizo una señal con el dedo antes de que esas chicas cerrasen, esperando a que nadie se acercarse.     Se metió dentro y ella ya se había lanzado a él, rodeándole con sus brazos.     La cogió en brazos, rodeando sus piernas en sus caderas, entrando en uno de los cubículos.     Sus besos se sentían hambrientos, como si lo hubiera estado deseando desde que se habían vuelto a ver.     Macie soltó un gemido al notar una presión contra ella. Era increíble que con solo un roce ya podía provocarla más de lo que jamás había sentido.

    Quería más. Deseaba más. Era él o nadie, no podía ser de otra forma.

    Y no era la única que lo pensaba.

     Jake no había sentido aquella atracción jamás, ni tampoco que en segundos ya tuviera una erección. Solo había bastado haberla visto animándolo a entrar que el deseo había podido con él.     Bajó la mano despacio, notando que la prenda ya estaba mojada.     En cierto modo le sorprendía. Aquella chica no conocía su nombre, no sabía quién era. Una parte de él se sentía orgulloso de que sin saber nada de él, le desease tanto como él a ella.     No quería que su primera vez fuera en el baño de un bar, no quería darle aquel recuerdo de él.    —El hotel…. El hotel donde me  alojó esta cerca… —se separó un poco de ella, tratando de coger aire mientras hablaba, su expresión de no querer haber parado le hacía sentirse culpable— Podemos ir ahí para estar más tranquilos… Sí es lo que quieres…     Macie asintió, notando cómo la cabeza le daba vueltas por aquella sensación de éxtasis. Notó que él esperaba una confirmación de sus labios, lo que le gustó bastante.    —Sí… Sí quiero… —sonrió mientras pasaba sus dedos por su cabello, dándole otro beso antes de salir del baño, aferrándose unos segundos.     Se separaron y miró por la puerta de que no hubiera nadie, para tomar su mano y salir corriendo hasta la mesa, cogiendo la sudadera y dejando un par de dólares en la mesa.

     Antes de llegar al hotel, se llegaron a parar a mitad de camino, volviendo a besarse. Jake la puso contra la pared, pasando sus manos por sus caderas, mientras que bajaba sus labios por el cuello. El frío no lograba esta vez molestar a Macie, ya estaba lo suficientemente caliente como para combatirlo.

    <<Oh, por favor, que esto no sea un sueño, que de verdad me esté besando en este instante.>>

     Macie sonrió durante el beso, esperando a que se nuevo la guiase hasta el lugar donde se alojaba.     No era un hotel de lujo, pero no le importaba, lo único que quería era pasar la noche con aquel hombre que llevaba en su mente desde que le conoció.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

     Cuando Jake abrió la puerta de su cuarto, la rubia llevó sus manos a su camiseta, subiéndosela. Le obligó a tumbarse en la cama, comenzando a besarle el cuerpo.    La respiración de Jake comenzó a agitarse, observando el rastro de pintalabios que iba dejando. No podía dejar de mirarla, ansiosa porque le perteneciera. No dejaba ni un lugar sin marcar.     Macie levantó la vista, sonriéndole de manera pícara, llevó sus manos a su pantalón, sentándose encima de él.    — ¿Puedo abrir mi regalo de cumpleaños? —preguntó con la respiración entrecortada, tirando de la prenda con el dedo.    —Es solo para ti —sentía una sensación como si estuviera borracho, pero no era así. Quería ser solamente de ella, pertenecerle como jamás había deseado hacerlo con alguien.     Vio cómo pasó su cabello detrás de la oreja, comenzando a desabrochar el botón de los pantalones y bajar la cremallera.    Bajó despacio la prenda, haciendo que el chico se sintiera cada vez más loco por su tacto.     Ella se rio al verle igual de desesperado que ella hacía unos minutos en el baño del bar, deseándolo tanto como ella.

     La pequeña habitación parecía arder en aquel momento ¿O quizás eran ellos?     Macie clavó con fuerza las uñas en su espalda, escuchando cómo él gemía. Era un sonido placentero escucharle así por ella, escuchar cómo pronunciaba su nombre entre cada movimiento de cadera.     Pero ella también quería decir su nombre, quería poder llamarle entre gemidos, que supiera cuánto le deseaba. Macie nunca se imaginó siendo de esa clase de personas que se acostaba con alguien sin saber su nombre y aún así, lo estaba haciendo ¿Qué misterioso motivo había detrás para tanto misterio? Oh, cómo le gustaba aquello, tanto que de pensarlo clavó más profundo las uñas.    —E-ey, cuidado, ángel —Jake le susurró, soltando un pequeño gruñido—, ese fue más doloroso.     Aquel apodo que escuchó de su boca hizo que la volviera loca. ‘Ángel’. Dos veces solo se habían visto y ya le había puesto un apodo.    —Y no pienso pedir perdón por dejar mi marca —Macie susurró en su oído, deslizando su mano por el cuello de aquel hombre.     Jake sintió electricidad al notar la voz de la chica penetrándose en su oído hasta llega a su cerebro, indicándole que estaba llegando a terminar.     Él se vino primero, tomando su mano y entrelazando sus dedos. Nunca antes había sentido aquel orgasmo como en el pasado ¿O alguna vez había tenido uno? Ya lo había olvidado, solo quería que fuera Macie con quien los tuviera.     Aquel sonido de su boca hizo que Macie se aferrarse más con sus piernas, echando la cabeza hacía atrás mientras sentía cómo su cuerpo temblaba de la excitación.     Le sorprendió cuando él pasó su mano por su cara, apartando su cabello y dejándole un beso en la frente. Movió sus dedos aferrados apretándolos con fuerza, casi quería llorar de felicidad por ver cómo le había dejado aquel beso.     Fue bajando hasta sus labios, respondiéndole con una felicidad extrema.    Lo había conseguido, por una noche, los sueños que había tenido se habían hecho reales.

    Y lo superaba con aquellos cuidadosos besos y caricias que recibía.

     No iba a pensar en lo que sucedería mañana, sino en lo que estaba sucediendo en aquel momento.    Aquel desconocido le estaba amando como jamás lo había hecho.

     Aunque solo fuera por aquella noche.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

    Logró escuchar los sonidos de las gaviotas y de las olas del mar, haciéndola abrir poco a poco los ojos.     Se dio cuenta de que no estaba en su casa, seguía en el hotel.     Se incorporó en la cama, viendo que el desconocido no estaba a su lado ¿Acaso se había ido y la había dejado sola?     Se tapó con la sábana, con el corazón empezando a destrozarse. Había estado toda la noche abrazado a ella, trazando un recorrido con sus manos hasta quedarse dormida. Y ahora ya no estaba.     En el momento que empezaba a notar cómo sentía que sus lágrimas querían brotar de sus ojos, escuchó la puerta abrirse.     Se incorporó secándose las pequeñas lágrimas que habían caído, viendo al joven entrar con dos vasos de café y una bolsa de papel en la mano.     Le miró con sorpresa, no esperaba que le trajera el desayuno en la cama.    —Pensé que te habías ido —se sentó en la cama, tomando en sus manos el café.    —Me dejé las bolsas de la compra en el bar, así que tuve que salir a comprar —un leve sonrojo apareció por sus mejillas, recordando que lo que le hizo olvidarse aquella compra fueron las ganas de estar con ella en su cuarto— ¿Pero por qué pensabas eso de mí? —le preguntó dejando la bolsa en la mesita de al lado, mientras se sentaba en la cama con ella.    —Porque no me has dicho todavía tu nombre y no estabas tras haberte acostado conmigo —le dio un sorbo al café, sin apartar la vista de aquellos ojos encantadores.     Jake soltó una risa floja, metiendo la mano en la bolsa de papel y sacando una rosquilla bañada en fresa y en virutas, acercándosela a su boca.    —Me llamo Jake —no pudo evitar en sentirse feliz al pronunciar su nombre después de tanto tiempo.     Macie le sonrió, aceptando también la rosquilla.     Le gustó por fin escuchar su nombre, para poder decirlo cada noche que soñaste con él.    — ¿Sería extraño si ahora dijera ‘ Encantada de conocerte, Jake’ o es demasiado tarde después de que nos hayamos acostado? —le dio un mordisco a la rosquilla, hasta ese momento no había notado lo hambrienta que estaba. En cuanto su lengua tocó el dulce sabor de la fresa, su estómago emitió un sonido.     Jake ladeó la cabeza, llevando su mano a su cara. Con el pulgar, le quitó una pequeña mancha de comida, lamiéndola después.     Otro tipo de “hambre” estaba regresando a Macie al haberle visto hacer aquello. No deseaba dejar aquel cuarto, Jake tendría que arrastrarla para echarla.    —Tomaré eso como un sí.    —No estoy acostumbrado a decir mi nombre tan fácilmente —le contestó dando un sorbo a su café, esta vez cambiando el tono a uno un poco más triste—, sobre todo porque ya me arriesgo bastante después de lo de anoche.    — ¿Te arrepientes de lo que hemos hecho? —Macie dejó la rosquilla encima de la bolsa, abrazando sus piernas.     Jake la miró, sus ojos curiosos trataban de adivinar lo que él pensaba.     Negó con la cabeza, pasando su cabello detrás de su oreja.    —Solo me arrepiento de no haberlo hecho en el momento en que te vi —vio cómo la joven inspiró profundamente cuando él dijo aquellas palabras.     Macie apretó las sábanas con fuerza, volviendo a contenerse ¿Pero por qué hacerlo si ya se habían acostado?    —Jake, si ahora mismo no nos besamos después de lo que has dicho, voy a perder la cabeza.     El joven aceptó su súplica, dejando su café en la mesita.     La atrajo hacia él, dejando que la sábana se cayera.     Macie pasó sus manos por debajo de su camiseta, recorriendo otra vez su cuerpo.     Le quería. Le deseaba. Él era el único que podía apagar aquel fuego que la consumía por dentro. Jake era el que más deseaba.

     El joven pasó sus dedos por su espalda, acariciándola como si fuera de cristal.     Sabía cómo era su vida, que no podía estar con Macie como seguramente ella esperaba. Pero había algo que le decía que no debía dejarla escapar, que si se alejaba de ella, seguramente la perdería para siempre.     ¿Qué pasaría si tras marcharse, ella decidía borrar aquellos besos con otro hombre? ¿Y si cuando regresaba a esa vida de fugitivo ella como venganza se acostaba con otro?     Separó sus labios para poder coger aire y la observó cómo si se una obra de arte se tratara, viendo la poca luz que entraba por la ventana, haciendo que se enfocase en sus labios antes rojos aquella noche, ahora rosados después de dejarle cada marca de ellos en su cuerpo que, por desgracia tras ducharse, se habían borrado.   —Esos labios… —Jake tomó su cara, pasando el pulgar por ellos, acariciándolos con delicadeza, casi como si fueran de cristal.     Estaba volviendo a sentir el calor que hubo aquella noche y está vez el alcohol no te ha la culpa. Era el fuego que él estaba sintiendo también por ella, con el miedo de que desapareciera cuando se separasen.    —Quiero que sean solamente míos… —sabía que era una petición imposible, pero tras haberlos probado, el solo pensar que otro hombre podría tenerlos le hacía querer ser posesivo por una vez en su vida.     —No te preocupes, no pensaba en entregárselos a nadie, Jake —se mordió los labios ante esa petición—, no quiero que me bese nadie más que tú.     El orgullo de Jake aumentó, fundiéndose de nuevo en aquel beso mientras la tumbaba en la cama.

    Esta vez la haría decir su nombre hasta que no tuviera voz para hacerlo y él repetiría el suyo como si de un rezo se tratase, algo que le recordase que alguien en el mundo le amaba por completo sin importar quién era él.

     Macie agradeció aquella segunda vez para pronunciar su nombre. Quería que también él pudiera escucharla y ver cómo le deseaba.

     Lo triste era que ella no sabía que la vida de Jake no le permitía el lujo de mantener una relación como cualquier persona normal.

     Que después de aquel día, no sabría cuándo Jake volvería a por ella y le volvía a demostrar que la única persona que le importaba ahora era ella.

     Pero cumpliría su promesa. Ningún hombre la besó salvo él.

[mylimerence]

ADAM DRIVER

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